


No Fear

by Geeky_Angelo



Category: Shadowhunters
Genre: Alec deserves nice things, Alec has a panic Attack, Angst, Anorexic!Magnus, F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Izzy/Maia, Jace and Alec friendship - Freeform, M/M, Magnus deserves nice things, Magnus has a panic attack, Malec, Sad Alec Lightwood, Sad Magnus Bane, Saphael, Self harm!Alec, clace
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-19
Updated: 2019-04-14
Packaged: 2019-04-25 04:49:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 36
Words: 28,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14371251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geeky_Angelo/pseuds/Geeky_Angelo
Summary: People in the SH books all have different phobias. Simon is scared of being alone, Raphael is scared of being touched, and so on. They all are at the institute for their "sickness", and are trying to get over it. But Magnus and Alec have hated each other for years. Will their love bring them together, or will their phobias bring the apart MALEC with bits of Saphael Clace and others





	1. Intro

**Author's Note:**

> So, I didn't just make this up by myself. This was inspired by the pentatonix story Phobia by @pentalyrics. So if some of the things I use are similar to her/his story. I DID NOT MAKE THIS UP ON MY OWN. And I don't own any of the characters. Except my own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can gong these stories on wattpad too. My profile is GeekyAngelo.

Alec's p.o.v  
Well hello, name is Alec and I am currently "sick". I have been in the institute since I was 13, and I'm 16. Along with Jace and Izzy, I am here because of my phobia. I have Aichmophobia, the fear of sharp objects. Since I've been here, it's kind off gotten better. I'm not scared of table corners, forks, or pencils now. And I've made friends. Clary, Simon, Raphael, and Maya. We all kind of came at the same time so it made being friends easier. But we all have made an enemy. Magnus Bane. From the moment we met him we knew he was trouble. I'm all his glitter and fashion, he's a snobbish, spoiled brat. He usually picks his fun at me cause I'm gay. But Raphael is asexual and bi, and Simon is pan. But he decides to bug me personally. But whoever we are, he talks to us like we're nothing although he's here for the same reason. I guess I'm just madder with him than necessary because none of us knows his phobia. You can find out everyone else's except his. To my knowledge only him and his 2 best friends know. Ragnor and Catarina are amazing people, I don't see how they're with a horrible person like him. Let's just say I hate him. But through it all, my friends and I have stuck together and have tried to get through our fears. We take it day by day, and hope to go back home. Hopefully the days ahead of us will be phobia free.


	2. Phobias

Alec- Aichmophobia, fear of sharp objects  
Simon- Autophobia, fear of being alone  
Raphael- Haphephobia, fear of being touched   
Izzy- Astraphobia, fear of thunder  
Jace- Nyctophobia, fear of darkness  
Maya-Zoophobis, fear of wild animals  
Clary- Entomophobia, fear of bugs  
Ragnor- Agnosiophobia, fear of not knowing  
Catarina- traumatophobia, fear of injury

 

Magnus' will be revealed later


	3. Morning

Alec's p.o.v  
" Alec, Alec Alec, Ale-"  
" ugh I get it Jace, get off of me already." I sighed as I got out of the bed. Jace had been poking me for 5 minutes now, interrupting my sleep. Jace and I have been roommates for a year, and after time, I got used to it. We usually slept in the same bed almost every night, and kept all the lights on. Due to his fear, the night often scared him, and sleeping with me helped him relax, although he would never admit that.  
" Come on Alec, we have to go to first period. Like now."   
" Wait WHAT! It's that late. I got up and put some pants on as I rushed to the bathroom quickly brushing my teeth, I remembered to get a new shirt on as I got my jacket. Jace just stood there amused.  
"What are you standing around for, lets go."   
" Alec." He said cracking up. " I meant breakfast not first period." I just glared and went to go take a shower and get myself actually together. 10 minutes later we ran out to get breakfast, meeting up with the rest of the group.   
"What's up A." Simon said cheerfully, while everyone else let out a chorus of heys and what's ups.   
"Nothin much." I replied sitting down with my tray. We then all started talking about everything going on in our lives. Jace and Clary were just engrossed with each other, while Maya and Izzy were talking about makeup. Well Izzy was talking about makeup, Maya was just pretending to care. A couple of minutes later, Raphael came and sat down.  
" Hey babe." Simon said as he switched spots with me to get next to Raphael. Well as close as he could get. We all knew of his phobia, and we wanted him to be as comfortable as possible. Instead of the normal kiss on the cheek that people do, Simon just smiled his bright smile, and gave him a loving look. Raphael gave the look back also. We continue talking until we get to talking about Magnus. We always try to guess what his phobia is, but never get it. We just know that he's been here since he was 9 and that his phobia must be bad.   
"Well all that glitter must've gone to his head to be here that long without leaving." We all started laughing until an annoying voice behind us.  
" I assure you that all my glitter is not necessary my dears. I have more knowledge than any of you ignorants anyway." We all glared at him as he smirked at us.  
"What do you think Alexander?" Clary stood up fuming.   
"Listen here you as-" "Clary!" I yelled before she would say something she regrets "Its fine." She huffed and sat back down. Magnus opened his mouth to say something but was cut off by Catarina calling him to go sit down. He turned around, and we all went to dump our plates and head to class. We all separated and went to our classes and sat down. The teacher started the lesson, and we all tried to focus.


	4. Assignments

Magnus' p.o.v  
Ugh, stupid Alexander and his stupid crew. I thought as I made my way to Catarina.   
"Can you believe them Cat?" I said throwing my arms up, " I swear one day I Swear I will knock out that red headed tra-"  
"MAGNUS." I stopped mid sentence and looked at her.   
"Look," she said tiredly," I know you've been crushing on that lightwood boy since he got here, but maybe you should express your feelings a little differently." I sigh as we start to walk toward our lockers. I open the locker and get my books out.  
" Cat, it's too late to be nice. Maybe one day when he gets out of here he'll miss me." I say sadly closing my locker. I start walking away and turned around looking at her. " And Cat, you and me both know I'll never get out of here." I walk away and go to my first class which was unfortunately with Alexander. I sat in my usual seat beside Ragnor, and start picking at my nails. "Okay everybody listen up." Mrs. Jackson said." We're switching things up a bit." That spiked my interest so I looked up and started listening. " As you know, it can be lonely in this institute, and with your certain," she paused a little," hardships it may be difficult to be friends. So I have picked partners for you all, and you will be together the rest of the year." A chorus of groans filled the room."For school reasons the pairs will be the same gender." She started calling our names and I was shaking with nervousness.   
" Makayla and Shelby, Clary and Isabelle, Simon and Raphael." She called out more names until she came to my name," Magnus Bane, and" please not Alec I thought." Alec Lightwood." My heart dropped as I looked over to Alec. A look of horror crossed his face, as his friend glared at me. I looked back at Mrs. Jackson and said nothing. Alec and I have gotten into enough trouble in this class. " Here are the rules. If you don't obey them you will make an F. Both of you." She said looking directly at us." You must spend 3 hours together a day not including school hours. " You must work on all the projects I give you together. I will know from the hall monitors and cameras if you break a rule. You get three strikes. Understood." Everyone murmured a yes as the bell rang. "Good. Class dismissed." I grabbed my bag and fought through the rest of the day. Dreading the 3 hours I have to spend with my soulmate, I mean MY CRUSH.


	5. Cafeteria

Magnus' p.o.v  
Before the dreaded 3 hours come, I hurriedly walked to my dorm and threw my books on my bed. I crash on my bed groaning about what was to come. In the middle of my sulking, Ragnor comes in and clears his throat.  
" Magnus, aren't you forgetting something?" He asked with a smirk." Yes I know I have to spend time with Alexander, as you see I'm mentally preparing for it." I add an eye roll for extra emphasis.   
"No, not that." He replied back. I immediately sit up and start thinking about what I could have forgotten. I start rattling them off.  
" Well, classes are over, I'm doing homework later, and I ate today. 2 whole apples slices. That's like a record for me." Ragnor eyes widened at this in disbelief.   
"Did you just say 2 apple slices! Magnus you know you need to eat more than that.  
"I can't eat more, you know I'll get fatter than I already am." Ragnor was about to speak when I quickly interrupted him.  
" Speaking of eating, I have a private class at Luke's office, gotta go.  
"Oh now you remember." I heard Ragnor mutter as I sprinted out the door. I just wish he wouldn't worry about me so much. Is it a crime to lose weight? As I ran to Luke's office I ran into something, no someone. Alexander Lightwood.   
" There you are, I don't know if you care about your grades, but I do. Let's get this over with." He grabbed my arm and pulled me the other way. I pulled my arm back and grimaced.  
"No, I have a private session with Mr. Garroway, so if you don't mind I will be on my way." I turned around and started back walking to Luke's office. I was quickly stopped by footsteps next to me.  
" Um. What are you doing?" I asked him as he stood by me.  
" The faster these three hours are over the better, so I'm going with you. Now come on I know where his office is." I catch up with him trying to stop him.  
" Well first of all it's a PRIVATE session, and second of all it doesn't count for school hours."  
" Well school hours are over, it's 3:30." I had no words. I sighed, he was right. Without saying a word I kept walking to Luke's office. When we finally reached his door I stopped.   
"Well, let's go." He walked in and I followed in after him, I was surprised how someone so shy could be so confident. I guess he would do anything to get a good grade. I walk in and shut the door behind me. The familiar smell of coffee brewing eased my mind as I sat down on the couch and waited for Mr. Garroway.  
"So, why do you come here, how often do you. Focusing on the comforting atmosphere I answered calmly," For my phobia, and everyday."  
" What is your phobia, I should have a right to know since we're partners for the rest of the year." I lashed out and stood up.  
" Don't you dare think you have any right to know my phobia, now don't ask me that again or I'll take a knife and shove it up your-"  
" Magnus that's enough." Like came in and set his hand on my shoulder, I took a hint and sat down. He walked behind his desk and sat down. He then looked at Alec with worried eyes. I looked at him too, I guess the knife thing really shook him. His face was pale and he was squeezing his hands into fists. He only did this for a minute before he returned to normal (with the help of Luke of course) but I made a note to not do that again. You should never mess with someone's phobia. The meeting went very different being Alec was there, but we did exercises without my phobia being exposed. An hour later we got out and before I could apologize Alexander stormed off. I struggled it off and got ready for food. We could go to the kitchen whenever we wanted, so everyone went about an hour or so after class. I walked as slowly as I could to the cafeteria, but I was even more slow since Clary came up to me.  
" You better watch out Bane. Be prepared." She ran around the corner to meet up with everyone else, and I thought nothing of it. I went as I normally did. I grabbed a plate and a spoon. Of course I can't gain wait so I decided on an apple and went to go take my seat by Cat. "Hey Bane." Yelled Jace from the other table. Watch where your going, the glitter might've gotten in your eyes." They started laughing along with everyone else in the lunchroom but I paid them no mind.  
" Oh don't worry about me, shouldn't you be in a cave of some sort, oh yeah I forgot, the darkness." I smirk at Jace and Clary's furious expressions. She stood up to speak until I interrupted her." Oh don't worry dear, I won't bother your little boy toy anymore." She just looked at me like she wanted to kill me, which I'm pretty sure, she did. I grabbed my apple in one hand and put my tray on the rack proud of myself. I said you shouldn't mess with a person's phobia, like throwing a knife at Alec, not that you can't talk about it.  
" Hey Magnus." Simon yelled standing up."Since we're talking about phobias let's talk about yours. I don't see a lot of food on that plate Bane. You scared of food or do you know your just gonna gain 30 pounds in 5 minutes." They started laughing and I tried to keep it together. I didn't want to eat or even try anymore. I get my apple and smile my signature smile, and turn around, trying to look unbothered.  
" Cat I'm going back to my dorm I have my apple." I walked out the door to turn around to my name being called.  
"Hey Magnus." Jace yelled. Rolling my eyes I looked at him push a button. Ragnor and Cat tell as I feel gallons of water being dunked on my head, knocking me to the ground. I hear laughter and looked up, trying not to cry. I couldn't breathe. It was everywhere surrounding me. I let out a sob as I realized I was there again. At the lake. Drowning. My head was being pushed down over and over again. No escape. NO ESCAPE. I feel arms around me picking me up and taking me out of there, the laughter still coming from the horrid room I just left. I sobbed and panicked as the arms laid me down on a bed. It was just like then. HE WAS RAPING ME!!!!! I tried to fight back as the arms wrapped around me. I heard humming. Not a pleasure filled one, but a soft toon. I focused and saw Cat holding me in her arms while Ragnor was right next to me. I relaxed and leaned into her sobbing.  
"C-Cat he was here, he was going to rape me again please don't let him get me, please." I cried desperately.  
" Don't worry he's never going to get you, he's dead. He's dead Magnus. "  
"Cat, I'm scared." I cried softly until I fell asleep in her arms.   
\-------------------------------------------------------

Catarina laid Magnus down and talked quietly to Ragnor. " Ragnor, I'm scared for him. He's not eating or sleeping. What if he won't get better?" Cat with tears rolling down her face." Don't worry he will." Ragnor said. "He will."

But little did they know. A certain Lightwood was watching. And tearing up with guilt... and another feeling he can't identify.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please vote and comment


	6. Anything and Everything

Alec's p.o.v.  
OH MY GOD. What did I just see? Was I even supposed to see that. I feel awful and Magnus probably hates me and I... wait hour assignment. I have time to make this up. And speaking of two hours we could do it right now. I calm myself down before I go back to my group.  
" Alec, did you see his face, it was priceless." Jace said laughing hysterically.   
"Ummm yeah, priceless." I said with a fake smile.  
"Alec, what's going on. Come on you know you can tell me anything."   
"It's water. Water is his phobia." I said. He just looked at me and started laughing. I got mad.  
" What's so funny. He had a panic attack Jace." His laughing died down until he was silent." Jace I went down to see the outcome of our prank. He looked miserable. I... I think he was raped."  
I've never seen Jace like this. He turned pale and regret immediately filled his eyes. He spoke, every word coming out of his mouth was serious now.  
"We have to stop messing with him. We have to tell the others."  He started to walk off until I grabbed his arm.  
" No we can't. We should just keep this to ourselves for now."   
"Yeah your right. " Jace said as I let go of his arm.  
"Well I have to go. You know the two hours we have." I saw him walk off until I called his name. He came back impatiently. But his face quickly softened when he saw the look on my face.  
"Alec what is it?" He asked worriedly. I had to say it I had to get this off my chest. I inhaled and looked at him.  
"Jace. I think I like him."   
"Like who?" Jace said. He knew who but I think he just wanted to make sure.  
"Magnus. I think I like him." He exhaled and looked at me.  
"Alec have you felt this already or do you just now like him because of his... problems."  He had a point, I never had thought of it. "I...I don't know."   
"Well you better figure it out, you shouldn't use him like that, especially after all he's been through. You have time to figure it out. 2 hours everyday is enough time." Jace walked off and I stood there thinking about Magnus. I then turned around and walked to his dorm once again. I knocked on the door not knowing what was to come. Magnus answered the door but he looked different. He had no makeup, glitter, or fashionable clothes. Well except for his briefs he had nothing on.   
" We have two hours together so umm yeah." I said looking down hoping he wouldn't see me blushing.   
" Ok come on in then. What do you want to do?" I look up at him to answer but couldn't speak a word. HE HAD ABBS!!!! He was beautiful. His hair was as black as night, his skin was just flawless, his eyes. Oh God his eyes.  
"Mm mm( Idk how to make this noise). If your done staring we can sit down and watch tv. Ragnor won't be here until late. Blushing I sat down.   
"So umm, let's talk."  
"About what?"  
"Anything, everything, whatever you want." I said nervously not expecting a reply. Until I got one. "Ok well... I know your scared of knifes right." I nod and took a risk.  
" I know your scared of water." He freezes and looks up at me. I quickly say," I don't care though, it's not a stupid phobia I mean who's not scared of water there's oceans, rivers, lakes.."   
"Alexander it's ok. I'm not mad." He said." Just don't tell anyone ok." I got nervous. "Well I told Jace, but he's not going to tell anyone. I swear he's not like that." Magnus nodded slowly.  
" ok don't tell anyone else then." I say ok and we both sit there in silence until he turns on the tv. RuPaul's Drag Race comes on and I gasp. It was my secret obsession after all. Magnus grinned and asked.   
"You like this show?"  
"Like it. I love it. There's nothing else like this show it's amazing." I quickly look down, blushing.  
"Oh well your actually a shy one aren't you," he said taking his hands through my hair," well it's ok I'll get you out of that shell of yours. But in the meantime. Do you see the design of her dress." He started talking about sequins and patterns and all types of fashion things.   
"So you want to be a designer." I asked curiously.   
"Well duh have you seen the way I dress?" We both start laughing and start talking about anything and everything." We talked until Ragnor came and I stood to get up. Surprisingly he walked me to the door. Once I'm out he says. "You know I was wrong about you Alexander, I look forward to meeting with you more." I nod my head as he closes the door. And with glee I skip.. I mean walk back to my dorm. Actually excited to see him the next day.


	7. Just Right

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry about this. A LOT of it was cut off and I didn't realize it until now. I'll fix it as soon as I can.

Magnus' p.o.v.  
I can't believe me and Alexander actually got along!!! We actually are more different than I thought. You thought I was going to say alike didn't you. Well we're not the same at all. He likes a movie date when I'd rather go to a club. He doesn't like what he doesn't know, and most of all. HE'S SO INNOCENT. After the incident with my dad, well I decided there was no point. I started drinking, and sleeping around since my innocence was taken away. We talked about all this surprisingly. He was just easy to talk to. Everyday we make up excuses to see each other until I got tired of it. I'm taking him to see Ragnor and Cat today during lunch. Which means his friends will see us. So that's how I ended up with a nervous wreck aka Alexander.  
" Alexander it'll be fine. If they really are your friends, they'll be supportive." I tried to reassure him, but I was really trying to reassure myself. Alec sat down quickly, but he spoke a thousand words per minute.  
" I know, I know, but what if they don't. We've, they've hated you for years now. They'll think you've put me under some spell or something (wink wink)." I sigh and grab his hand. " Alexander look. Even if they don't accept it. So what. You shouldn't care what everyone else thinks about you. Look at me, I don't care." He sighs and looks at me. " Its not that easy Mags. Growing up, I've always been bullied. Not because of my phobia, but because I actually was proud of myself. But over time, I guess I just lost all confidence. Especially cause I'm gay. Since I came out it was like a target on my back. I've lost friends, and been bullied constantly. By my parents, classmates, and so many others." He looked up at me sadly." But look at you. Your beautiful, popular, you have nothing to worry about. Your probably as rich af too." I immediately feel bad. If only he knew. The announcement for everyone to go to the lunchroom rang out and we stood up slowly. I turn towards him. "You ready?" He nods, but he looks like he has to puke. We walk towards the cafeteria and go toward HIS table. They look at me like I'm a serial killer, and immediately reach out to grab Alec. "Look Bane, I don't know what your playing at, but you better move along if you know what's good for you." Isabelle said with confidence. Taking a deep breath I start to talk. " Look I know that we've had some bad history, but me and Alec are friends now. These past couple of weeks have been... enlightening and it turns out we really hate each other for no reason." They just look more furious. Izzy spoke first. " Look, we all know your just trying to get us to trust you just to embarrass us again. So just stop now and go back to your table." Her eyes bore into my soul. I look over to Alec and he gives me a sad look. Then all of a sudden Jace stands up. " Look guys, I know that we shouldn't trust him, but we should give him a second chance." " We've given him thousands of chances already Jace." " Ok well don't do it for me, do it for Alec. He's told me about the past couple of weeks, and he's been happy for a change." Everyone went silent and looked at Alexander. " He makes me happy." He said blushing and looking down. Everyone at the table sighs and look at me. Izzy puffs out a breath and looks at me. "Congratulations Bane, you get a second chance. Just don't F*ck it up." I give a small smile as Alexander mouths a thank you to them. He sat down and looked at me expectantly. There was a huge gap next to Raphael so I decided to sit by him. I feel all of them stare at me as Raphael tenses. I immediately feel insecure but try to hide it. "What." I ask. Simon speaks up. " He doesn't like to be touched." He spray it out as if I was trying to mock him. He probably thought I was. " Oh ummm, sorry." I scoot over until I see Raphael relax and just sit there. Everyone immediately starts talking. You know how friends are, telling jokes that only they can understand, and throwing food at each others heads. I decide I can't take it anymore and ask them. " Hey is it ok if Ragnor and Catarina come over here." They all stare at me like I killed their mom. A chorus of yes's and sures' go around the table. I look back to find them staring at me. I beckon them over and they sit down next to me, avoiding Raphael like the others told me. We start talking until everyone calms down and starts eating. Well everyone but me. Catarina was about to eat when she looked down at my plate. "Magnus.. why don't you have anything." She drew everyone's attention by saying this. I smile and try to ignore the stares. " Cat, you know I'm on a diet." "Yeah, an air diet." She said plopping some grapes on my plate. "Eat." She said. Luckily an angel protected me. Izzy decided to start a conversation. "So anyone watch Project Runway?" I gasp involuntary, and she looked at me. " Do you like it?" She asked curiously. I smirk and lean over on my elbow. " Like it? Honey I LOVE it." We then started talking about the show while Cat talked with Raphael, and Ragnor talked with Simon. Dinner was too short for me, but there will be other days. I think this just might work out.


	8. Testing

Alec's p.o.v

The idea of having Magnus and his friends over turned out greater than I had planned. After Izzy had set aside all grudges against Magnus, they actually found out they had a lot in common. They like the same tv shows, clothes, and both like boys. Shocker there right? But that's the problem. All they do is talk about me. And I absolutely 100% hate it. It's not like I like being acknowledged by people. Ok I may like it a tiny bit.... Ok you got me, a lot. All my life being the oldest in the family, I never really got much attention. Don't get me wrong the first couple years of my life were great, but then my phobia took over. Jace took over too. He was smart, athletic, basically the perfect son. I know he was abused, but I couldn't help but to feel jealous. When he rose so did Izzy, leaving me behind. I'm not that athletic or that smart. I can shoot a bow and arrow and hit the target, but that's not as good as playing football, or doing gymnastics. I just never was enough. Jace had perfect blonde hair, while mine is matted and dark. Izzy is popular, where I remain unseen. Even with the phobias they're still perfect. Jace sleeps with me though, but can I really blame him for that. When we adopted him, we found out he was abused. His dad use to beat him, break his fingers, basically turned him into a soldier. But that's not what started his phobia. His dad used to lock him in the closet. It was dark, basically torture for a little kid. But he played noises. Horrible ones that just broke Jace. But I guess that's why they adopted him. He was broken. Maybe even more than me. Him and Izzy are the only one that knows what happened to me, I can't risk anyone else knowing. It's just too much to bear. But I guess that's why he sleeps with me. We've done that since we were kids and haven't stopped. But we've improved. The room is semi dark when we sleep, and we don't sleep in the same bed every day. Which adds to my point. He's improved so much and I haven't. Perfect. But yet he hangs out with me. I'm the one he trusts the most(or so he tells me). I'm just waiting for the moment he realizes I'm not what he thinks of me. Which might be bad already. We're at an assembly meeting now. At least I'm getting time off of class. At least now I...  
"HELLO, EARTH TO ALEC." I snap out of my thoughts as Izzy yells at me. " She's starting, pay attention." I look at Magnus and he just shrugs at me and looks at the head of the school. Mrs. Herondale. She's like the wicked witches evil sister. And yes you heard me right. The WICKED WITCH'S EVIL SISTER. That's how cruel she is. With a loud voice she starts talking.   
"It's the middle of the year and you know what time it is. Your midterm test. As you all know, we have been training you all for quite some time. But this time your challenge will become more difficult and challenging. It's time to FACE YOUR FEARS. Testing starts next week, prepare according. And good luck."  
Everybody immediately starts freaking out, especially me. Imagine, a room full of knives... it makes me start to breathe harder. Face your fears have been going on for years. So in the "test", you get put in a room with your biggest fear. In the beginning of the year they do it and time you. This time we have to stay in the room longer than last time. Which is, by the way, impossible. I look around and everyone at the table is calling the wicked witch out of her name, and cussing. Except Magnus. He paled and stood frozen, before he got up and started walking toward the dorms. No one sees him but me as I watched. All he had on his plate was an apple, that he was throwing away. I eavesdrop on the conversation as the witch talks to him.  
"Oh Mr. Bane, not eating I see. Wouldn't want your lack of health killing you." And with that she walked away. He jogs out the auditorium and I stand up immediately. Just seeing him Catarina says,"Oh it's ok, he's probably just going to the bathroom. He's been complaining about his outfit all day." She says with worry. She had a bad reaction to our test coming up.  
" I'll go check on him just in case." She nods at me and sit down as I run to catch up with him. I finally reach his dorm. Not bothering knocking, I walk in. I can't believe what I saw.


	9. Shattered Glass

Magnus's p.o.v  
I finally reach his dorm. Not bothering knocking, I walk in. I can't believe what I saw.

Magnus stood shirtless and pant less in the mirror. His eyes watered as he took a deep shuddering breath. Why am I so ugly? He thought sadly. He knows one second ago he was fine, but I guess something just triggered this. He punched the skin on his stomach and felt disgusted. The tears flowed freely now as he thought about every song love flaw he had. He bit his lip until it drew blood. He was going to bite down harder until he heard the door open abruptly.  
"Hey Magnus, I was just see-" Alec stilled as he looked at Magnus. Of course he thinks I'm hideous, Magnus thought bitterly. Magnus quickly tries to play it off, but he knew it was too late.  
"Hey Alexander, you like what you see. " Seriously Bane, Magnus thought. You know you don't want to hear the answer. Alec just stood there. Magnus just closed his eyes and tried to regulate his breathing. Alec was frozen still, a thousand thoughts were going in and out of his head. Why was he crying, why was he so skinny, who did this? Alec suddenly came to the realization that him standing there like an idiot made him look bad. Slowly he closed the door and took a few steps forward. He struggled to think of something to say, but he didn't have to.   
"I know what your thinking." Magnus said sadly. " I know I'm ugly, you don't have to act like you don't see it." Alec was taken aback by what Magnus just said. Fat, ugly. It's impossible that he thinks this of himself. Snapping out of his daze, Alec went up to Magnus.   
"Magnus what are you talking about. I know I'm not good with words but I'll try to say this the best I can. Magnus you are beautiful. You aren't fat or ugly. Your the opposite. Come to think of it.... when was the last time you ate." Magnus looked up at Alec.   
" I'm too fat to eat. I'm fine." Alec looked at Magnus in disbelief. Panicking he grabbed Magnus's wrist.  
" Magnus, come on we need some food in your system now." Magnus yanked his hand away with anger.  
" YOU can't tell me what I need!! You don't get it. I need to lose weight...I, I can't eat, I won't."  
Alec took a step back and tried to talk to Magnus.   
" Magnus. I was there. When you broke down after Jace's prank." Magnus looked at Alec with horror.  
" I heard how you were r-raped, and I want to help you. You can get through this, but starving yourself won't help." Magnus got mad and lashed out.  
"And what do you know. You've basically had the perfect life. Perfect siblings, parents. You have everything you want. You know NOTHING about being depressed or suicidal. You've had everything given to you on a silver platter. You can't help me when you can barely help yourself!!!!" Magnus's fist went to the mirror but Alec grabbed his waist and pulled him back. They both landed on the ground.   
" What the Hell lightwood. Let go of me. Magnus pushed Alec off of him. He just scooted over and put his elbows on his knees. He took a chance and looked at Alec who was in the same position. He looked so hurt and Magnus was about to apologize when Alec looked at him. Alec sighed and started to speak.  
"I know you think you know me but you don't. My life isn't perfect. My dad cheated on my mom a couple of years ago, and that made us drift farther from each other thank we already we're. My dad is homophobic and my mom ignores me. It hurts so bad, and yet they don't care about how I feel. I never liked football or regular sports like Jace and Izzy. Sometimes I feel like they adopted Jace to replace me. Like they knew I was going to be a huge disappointment when I got older." Magnus tried to speak but Alec stopped him again." The surprising thing about all this is the irony of it all. You think YOU'RE ugly? Look at me. I'm hideous. You know nobody's ever once said anything good about the way I look.EVER. And every time someone might like me, everyone else finds it so hard to believe. I'm just saying your not the only one with scars here." Magnus was shocked and at a loss for words. He scooted over to Alec and grabbed his hand.   
"I'm sorry for snapping at you like that. I just have so many bottled up emotions, it gets hard to control them sometimes." Alec cracked a half smile.  
" Well your way of managing your emotions is better than mine." Magnus gave Alec a confused look, and Alec took his hans away. He took off his shirt and Magnus gasped. Scars. So many of them on his arms stomach. Some even made out words. Useless, ugly, fag. Magnus let a tear roll down his face.   
"Alexander, how long has this been going on?"  
"About 3 or 4 years." Magnus's heart broke. How can such an amazing person like Alec do this to himself.  
"You know when everybody puts you down it feels like you have no one. I just felt worthless. I tried to commit suicide 3 times, but as you can see none of them were successful." Magnus let the tears fall freely from his face.  
"Alec. When was the last time you did this."  
He looked down.  
"2 days ago." Magnus let out a sob. 2 days ago. He couldn't take this.  
" Alexander, you can't keep doing this. You are amazing, I can't lose you."  
"The same goes for you too. You are the most beautiful, compassionate, loving person I know. You are so strong. I can't lose you either." Alec took a deep breath." Magnus, I love you."   
"Oh Alexander." Magnus was unsure at first but now he knew. Alec was the one. He leaned in meeting Alec half way. Their kiss was like fireworks, and greater than they had imagined. They pulled apart panting and smiling. But Magnus's smile soon faded.   
"Alexander we need to make a promise," Alec nodded and looked at him," We WILL get better. Together." Alec nodded, and they kissed again. They were the happiest they had ever been for a long time.


	10. Dating???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Easter/ April fools everyone!!!!

   They sat just like that on the floor (after a long make out session) wrapped up in each other's embrace. Magnus had his clothes back on, and the broken parts of mirror were cleaned off of the floor. They were having a good moment before everyone burst through the door.  
"Come on you guys what's taking so long-" Izzy burst in with everyone else right behind her. They stopped in their tracks to take in the sight in front of them.   
" Ok," Jace started," what the hell is going on." Magnus and Alec broke away quickly trying to think of something to say. But luckily Izzy and Clary started fangirling.  " I knew it, you 2 had it out for each other from the start. My ship has finally sailed!!!" They started squealing and Jace just rolled his eyes. Alec and Magnus sprung up and blushed. Catarina wasn't having any of it.   
" Seriously though, are y'all dating or not."  
Magnus opened his mouth to say no but Alec beat him to it.  
"Yes!" He yelled."I-I mean if you want to." He looked at Magnus. Magnus smiled and gave Alec a peck on the lips.  
"How does that answer your question." Alec smiled and heard squealing, and saw Catarina give a thumbs up. Even Jace was trying not to smile.  
"Ok I'm about to be sick." Jace said," Lets go. The fear challenge is coming up." Everyone looked sad and walked out. Looking pale Magnus took a deep breath. Alec saw this and grabbed his hand. They me eyes and Alec grabbed his cheek and kissed him.  
" Hey we can do this. Together." Magnus smiled and nodded. They walked out the room hand in hand, preparing for the worst.


	11. You Have Failed Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Flashbacks are Seperate in here. Just ask if you don't the see them.

We walked in the meeting area as Mrs. Herondale started speaking. " Now I shouldn't have to explain this to the people who have been here for a...lengthy amount of time," She looked at us while she said this," But I will explain the process with the newcomers. We will take each one of you to our Simulation Room. The simulations will show your fears in different levels. We will record your progress throughout the year, and depending on your statistics we will let you leave. Now shall we begin." The newcomers bursted with excitement at the news, but we knew better. All of us already felt fear in the pits of our stomach, but hopefully we can push through. The newcomers went first, and every single time we saw people pass out with fear, or go into a full blown panic attach. After each person went, they were immediately sent to their room so they wouldn't have to see everyone else. But at least visiting hours were extended. Ironically we were the only ones left, at least we had each other. Maya went first. As Maya went in the simulation her heart pounded. She hoped her willpower to get out of the institute was stronger than her fear. First came level one. A small door opened, and a tiny puppy came in. Maya wasn't terrified, but she still remained cautious. The intercom came on giving her the first command. "Pet the dog for 7 seconds." Maya gulped but did as it asked. Hey this isn't so bad. Maya thought while she smiled a little. Then a whistle came from the outside and the dog went away. Then came a German shepherd. It was growling and looking at her like she was a full course meal. But she remembered this from last year. This was the level she made it to. If she can do this, then her sentence would be shortened. She walked over to it slowly, and hesitantly put her hand on it's head. The dog immediately turned soft, and was looking playful. Maya laughed because she succeeded. But then all of a sudden a whistle sounded and the dog started growling again. It sprung on her in a matter of seconds. It almost ripped her face off when the dog left the room and the intercom came on. " You did not progress from the last test. You may leave." Maia walked out and ran to her dorm, trying to keep her thoughts out.

_Maia was on the sidewalk playing jump rope when her brother came out. "Hey look what I got." She looked in the bucket he had, just to be splashed in the face with barbecue sauce. He laughed and Maia cried. He went back in the house, but Maia fell to the ground clutching her knees to her chest. She heard growling and looked up to see 3 German shepherds eying her. She stood up and ran. They followed her and sprang onto her. Their claws were ripping into her arms and neck. She screamed until a man came to her and shooed them off. He took her to the hospital, where she stayed for a week. They healed her, but the scratches on her neck were always a reminder of how terrible wildlife is._

 The group tried to stop her but they saw her crying, and decided to talk to her after their turn. Simon took a deep breath. It was his turn. Raphael walked next to him until they were at the door to the simulator. " Hey, don't be scared. Remember I'll always be with you. In here." Raphael touched his own heart and Simon smiled. Raphael turned to leave as Simon went in the room. After 30 seconds he started to panic but pushed it down. I'm never alone, he's here with me. Simon regulated his breathing and smiled. Two more minutes and he would shorten his sentence. He smiled knowing he won. But then all of the lights went off. And he lost it. He tried to walk forward but he was blocked on all 4 sides. "Get me out of here!" He started breaking down as the memories started to haunt him.

_"Mommy." Simon was 6 years old at this time. " Are you okay?" Simon's mom was stretched out in front of the tv. A half bottle of vodka in her hand. She sat up and looked at him. "Ok? Your Father is dead. And the result is me being stuck with you and your sister!"She spat this as she backed him up into the closet. "You know what I need. TO BE ALONE!! She slammed and locked the door. Simon beat on the wall but no one came to get him. He stayed in there for 2 days, until his sister got him out. He ran out and clinger to her for dear life. Since then he never wanted to be alone._

 He heard the intercom come on." You did not progress. You may leave." Simon got up and sprinted as fast as he could. He didn't care where he was, as long as there were people there. A lot of people. Raphael was nervous, and mad, and scared. How dare they make HIS Simon cry. He will get them back. One day. Raphael was next to take his test, and he walked up in there. Trying to look confident. The door opened and a man came in. He looked nice, and wore a suit. He walked toward Raphael with quick strides. Raphael stood his ground preparing himself. The man stopped in front of him and held out his hand for a handshake. Taking a deep breath, Raphael shook his hand for 3 seconds. The man nodded and stepped back. Raphael smiled in his head and felt proud. Then the man opened his arms for a hug. Raphael closed his eyes. Don't worry, it's just like hugging Simon. Raphael hugged the man and let go. He progressed. He had to. Then all of a sudden he was grabbed. The man squeezed him to where he couldn't breathe. Raphael felt his body being yanked and pulled all sorts of ways and he tried to leave but the man's hold on him was too strong. He started sobbing and the man threw him against the floor and walked out.

_"Hold him up." Raphael was 9 years old. He attended a prestigious catholic school and was the top of his class. That's why he got beat up so much. The two boys behind him held his arms back as the one in front of him punched and kicked him senseless. He came home with new bruises everyday. And on top of that he had A LOT of siblings. He was roughed around by his brothers and he hated it. One day at school his bullies had rocks in a sack. Two boys held him down...and the others stoned him. He had broken bones and was bleeding everywhere. When he got to the hospital he tried to put up a fight, but didn't succeed. He stayed in the hospital for weeks until he got let out. When he finally did come out of the hospital, he wanted to make sure nobody would hurt him anymore. He didn't let anybody touch him, and when they did, he went into a panic attack and started crying. He hasn't gotten touched by his family since then._

 "You have failed the test. You may leave." Raphael walked out and avoided contact with everything. He was so scared, but he couldn't do it. He couldn't see Simon, not right now.


	12. You Have Failed Part 2

Izzy was next to face her fear. Her face was so pale and she shook by just the thought of thunder. Alec pulled her to the side, and tried to calm her down.  
"Hey, if we pass we can all leave. Together. You can do this." Izzy have a small smile and walked into the simulator. Once she walked to the middle of it the lights shut off. A small light came on and you could see rain in the window in front of her. Then came the first clap of thunder. It was only medium, so she felt more confident. It kept on thundering and she smiled. She did it. But then the whole room went pitch black. On all the walls loud thunder was rolling. She covered her ears but she could still hear it. She sunk to the floor as tears rolled down her cheeks.

 

Izzy was a little girl. With her pink raincoat and boots on she was ready to face the rain. She was smiling and ran outside when her mom opened the door. Alec and Jace were having a "manly" sleepover and the rules were that girls weren't aloud. With Maryse behind her, Izzy ran up and down the street jumping in puddles and having fun. But then it started thundering. Loud thundering that made your house shake and your ears bleed. Izzy was scared and turned around just to find no one there. Turns out Maryse had an important phone call and had to stay behind a little bit. Izzy sunk down to her knees crying. The thundering was so loud in her ears, that all Izzy could do was sit there and cry. Until Maryse came to get her. 7 minutes later.

 

Izzy was shaking and her eyes were closed.  
" You have not progressed. You may leave." Izzy didn't even realize the lights were on but when she did she walked slowly to the door. She went to catch up with the others in their dorms trying to stop her tears. Clary was next. Jace kissed her on the lips.  
" It'll be ok. You've gotten so much better, you can do this."  
"O-Ok." She said. Clary kissed him one more time then went into the simulator. She took a deep breath and prepared herself for the worst. Then she heard it. Buzzing. She looked around and tried not to scream. There were hundreds of bugs swarming around her, but she stood still. She realized she could take this. She opened her eyes right as the room went dark. The door opened and ants started pouring in. She stepped back, but it didn't work. The ants attacked her feet and climbed up the rest of her body. 

 

" Mommy look at me." Little clary was in her overalls and stood next to a tall tree. She then went to climb up the tree. "Hey be careful. There are lots of bugs up there." Her mother warned her, but being the child she was, Clary didn't listen." I'm not scared of no bugs Momma." Clary yelled from the tree. But then she reached for a branch and everything happened at once. Black bugs were surrounding the branch, and the second Clary touched it, they engulfed her entire arm. She screamed and let go of the branch. Luckily her mom caught her right before she hit the ground. She swat all the bugs away and held a crying Clary. After that Clary barely played outside. And when she did, she had at least 3 cans of bug spray.

 

She screamed and ran out of the room. Surprisingly the door opened and she went to her dorm to take a long shower.

    Alec and Magnus looked at Jace with a worried expression. He was pacing back and forth, hitting the wall, and mumbling to himself. He was supposed to go in by himself but he got too distracted in his thoughts. A man in a white nurse outfit walks out and grabs Jace, but didn't expect to get punched. Jace said nothing as he walked in the simulator. The lights dimmed a little but Jace didn't budge. Alec and him trained his fear every night. Alec would sleep in his bed and leave him when he fell asleep. Jace knew that he was safe then. Then the lights went all the way down making it pitch black. Jace's breath got ragged, but he stood firm.

 

Jonathan. Will you come over here? "Yes Father." Have replied as he walked toward Valentine. Valentine took him to the basement and locked the door. He then put on night vision goggles and held a paddle. "Jonathan, to be strong, you must endure physical pain. And I am sorry that I have been lenient on you for so long." Jace felt a tear roll down his cheek. "Father, w-what did I do." Valentine walked over to Jace and wiped his cheek. "Oh nothing Jonathan. I'm just doing this because I love you." Valentine walked over to the lights and cut them off. Jace couldn't see anything and all he could feel was pain. To say Valentine beat the living daylights out of him was an understatement. Yet his cries were never heard in the soundproof basement. Jace didn't let himself break because of his flashback. He was a soldier, he couldn't break down. But then he hears noises. Wood was beating against the wall coming closer to him. Jace thought of the paddle. He yelled out. "Ok I'm done. I know I didn't progress, just let me out please!" He tried to keep the desperation out of his voice, but he couldn't. The lights immediately came on, and the sounds stopped. Jace ran out and went toward his dorm, but then he remembered. Clary. He had to comfort her. He went to find Clary and the others, fixing his face to a neutral expression. Him leaving left only Magnus, Alec, Catarina, and Ragnor.


	13. You Have Failed Part 3

Ragnor feigned confidence as he walked into the simulator. After the doors closed behind him, his mind went a hundred miles a second. Due to his "illness" he has to know everything. But there's nothing wrong with not wanting to be stupid. Right. As the light in front of him went out. Ok Ragnor you can do this. Pi equals 3.1415926536.... The light in front of him came on, and there was a blackboard, and on it was a simple math equation. Oh well, this isn't so bad. Ragnor reached for the chalk on the board when the intercom came on. "You must do the equation using mental math." Ok.Ragnor thought. It took him longer than usual, but he got the equation right. He also got the next one. He felt great. He wasn't scared of not knowing everything. He DID know everything. Ragnor smirked, and was about to do his version of a victory dance (which scarred Magnus and Catarina for days.) when the lights went dark again. This time, a smart board came on. A man walked in and stood next to him. He looked like a priest. That immediately gave off red flags. A picture of The solar system came on and the preacher man started talking.  
"I'm assuming you don't believe in God."  
Ragnor was shocked at his bluntness." Well not really, there's a lot of scientific explanations for everything on this Earth." The preacher nodded. " Well in Genesis it said God created the heavens and the Earth..."  
"Woah let me stop you there. Actually gravity made solar nebula collapse on itself, and it spun and made the sun. And after that the remaining parts clumped up and made the other planets, and Earth." Try to prove me wrong. Ragnor thought smugly.  
" Well, I went to school also, and I also know that the books say that there was gas and dust in the solar system before all this."  
"Yes, there was."  
"So, answer me this. How did all that get there. I understand that you believe all these scientific theories, but how did the dust and air get there. If there wasn't a God, then who put it there."  
Ragnor's swallowed a little. His veins pulsed on the side of his neck. " I cannot answer that. The particles were just there."  
" Yes, but how did they get there." The priest just looked so calm, it was driving Ragnor mad.  
" I... There are thoughts that..."  
" Thoughts huh, are you saying that you do not know." Ragnor saw red, but tried to keep his composure." I DO KNOW." The priest still looked calm.  
"No you do not. And you're terrified about it. Aren't you." Ragnor felt a tear fall down his face. He rushed forward and pushed the priest against the wall. All he saw was red. After all it's better to show anger than fear. 

 

"Mr. Fell. "His 4th grade teacher called. "Can you solve this equation." Ragnor shook with nervousness as he walked up slowly to the chalkboard. " Ummm...Well. All the kids in his class started laughing at him. He couldn't do it. He went to his desk and sat down and his teacher sighed and went to the front of the class. Well, class is almost over. Here are your tests from last week. Everyone in the class got an A. Except Ragnor, who made a F. When he was walking home later that day, the boys in his class decided to confront him.  
"Oh poor Rags. Can't even make an a on the easiest test." They started laughing as Ragnor started to sprint home. His mom was waiting for him at the door. The truth was... they were very poor. Ragnor wore the same clothes every day, because they couldn't afford anything else. Therefore earning the nickname Rags. He ran in the house and cried, and made a decision. He would never be called stupid again. Ever. He grabbed all the books he could and studied. His mom walked in and was worried. " Baby, you know you can have a little fun." Ragnor shook his head. "No. I have to be smart. I.. I don't want to be dumb again." Ragnor's mom frowned. "Ragnor look at me. You aren't dumb, your just falling a little behind. You will always be the smartest boy in my world. Understand?"  
"Yes mama." They hugged and read the entire night. But still no matter what. The fear of not knowing always haunted him.

 

Two guards came in and dragged Ragnor out of the room. With the words You have failed echoing. Surprisingly, he didn't go to his dorm immediately. Catarina ran up to him and hugged him.  
" Oh Ragnor." Ragnor sighed and began to walk away. Catarina, being her helpful self, went into the testing room quickly. Forget the darn test, she needed to get to her boyfriend. The first thing that came on was a weird documentary. On sickness. Catarina shuddered with disgust. Let's just say that her and sickness didn't mix. The documentary showed a lot of people in a hospital bed. Tied to life support, or other machines. It made her a little scared but it was just a video, it's not like it could get to her through the screen. She was biting her lip, knowing it was going to get worse. Then the door opened. There were two people. A lady coughing...and a man with an oxygen tank. His skin was discolored and wrinkly. Catarina almost dropped dead. They started walking toward her and Catarina panicked and started hyperventilating. They reached out to touch her, and she screamed. 

 

Catarina was ten years old, and already out in the waiting room. Her dad was by her side asleep when the nurse came in. "Mr. Loss. Your wife is awake and is able to have visitors. They both got up and went into the room and by the hospital bed. There lay Catarina's mom. She had been deathly sick for weeks now, and there was no cure. So all Catarina could do was watch her mom die slowly. From sickness. Catarina's mom looked up."Hey baby." Catarina felt tears in her eyes. "Don't die mommy." Her mom smiled at her and grabbed her hand. "I will always be with you." She kissed her hand and let it go. Her husband kissed her forehead and had a sad look on her face. Then the machine next to her went off and they were rushed out of the room. Her time of death was 9:02 p.m. on August 17.

 

She stumbled towards the door and opened it, trying to run out. Magnus caught her as she fell to the ground. He opened his mouth to comfort her when one of the guards took her and carried her to her dorm. Alec was next, but he didn't want to go (of course). Not just because he was scared, but because of Magnus. The entire time they were waiting he was pacing back and forth. He was pale, his knuckles were white, and just not himself. But Alec knew what to do. After the test he wasn't going to leave. He was going to sneak behind the pillars and wait for him. Alec already knew of his fear of water, so what could go wrong. Alec walked in the room already feeling his stomach in knots. The lights dimmed, and he heard scraping. Metal on metal. Alec panicked and was about to call quits when he remembered. "Alexander we need to make a promise,"Alec nodded and looked at him." We WILL get better. Together.  
Alec remembered that moment and smiled. He stood firm. Then the next level came. A man walked in. He was holding two knives and getting closer to Alec. Alec gasped and backed into the wall behind him.The man came closer and closer. Until they were inches apart. Come on Alec. For Magnus. Alec thought of Magnus's face and stood firm. With a tight voice he said.  
" You don't scare me." The man paused, and they stared at each other for mere seconds before the man raised the knife and slashed at Alec's wrist. Alec cried out in pain as the guards grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him out. 

 

" No!Stop! "Maryse cried to the man in front of them. Alec, Izzy, and Jace were all huddled behind her and Robert. (They were at least 8 or 9) They were all looking in horror at the murderer before him. He had been in the news for quite a while, but they never expected he would've came to them. But he was also known for killing rich people and taking their money. "Now this is what I'm gonna do. I'm going to kill you from youngest to oldest understand. Starting with this one." And just like that he took Max and slit his throat. Maryse started sobbing, and Robert stood up. Just to be met with a gun to his head.  
"Oh. You didn't think I was stupid enough to bring just one weapon did you?" With that Robert crouched back down to the floor.  
"Now who's next?" The man met eyes with Izzy and gave her a sadistic smile. "Well aren't you a pretty one." He reached out to grab her, but Alec shot up. " You can't touch her. Leave her alone!" The man put his gun down. "Oh so your the tough one. Well then change of plans then. You'll go next." He grabbed Alec and took him to one of the rooms in the back. Of course he was crazy so he left his phone. He then turned around and said. "Call the police if you want. By the time I'm done with this one. I won't need to kill anyone else. I'll be satisfied enough." With that he went in the room, locked the door, and threw Alec on the bed. He grabbed his knife and held Alec down. He touched the knife and traced all over Alec's back and stomach. The sirens were outside but the man kept going. Alec's cries didn't matter at that point. The police broke open the door and shot the man above Alec. After that Alec blacked out from blood loss. Later that week he woke up in the hospital and lifted up his gown. Ugly scars littered his body. They were a reminder. Never touch anything sharp. But ironically he did. He started cutting, and he was afraid of sharp things. Funny huh. But to him it's different. At least this knife, this pain was in his control.

 

Alec fell out the door, and onto Magnus's feet.  
"Alexander what happened!!"  
"The-The man, h-he cut my wrist." Magnus picked up the sleeve on Alec's arm to find nothing but old scars.  
"Alexander there's nothing here. You could've imagined it."  
"N-No Magnus, I know what I felt. It was real." Magnus brought Alec to his feet and put his hand on Alec's cheek.  
"Everything's going to be alright." Alec nodded and brought Magnus into a hug. A nurse came out and spoke with her lips in a thin line.  
"Magnus Bane. You are the last one. You may begin."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey don't forget to like and comment. Sorry I couldn't do Magnus's today. My phone's almost dead, and I have church tomorrow so it's basically my bedtime. All I'm going to say is that the next chapter will be a surprise if you haven't already guessed it. 


	14. Magnus's Secret

__Alec walked out of the room. Well at least pretended to. When Magnus walked in the testing room the guards left. Alec crept back in the room, and went through the door that led to the viewing room. Multiple people along with Imogene were in the room. Alec quickly hid behind the plant that was there. Luckily no one noticed him, so all he could do was watch Magnus through the large window. When Magnus walked into the room he felt... well he just felt horrible. Passing this test for him was like finding a needle in a haystack. Like a really big one. Like one the size of Japan. But he promised Alexander he would try. Maybe he would surprise himself. He didn't notice it at first, but in the middle of the room was a huge pool. He had been there long enough to know what he was supposed to do, so he walked toward the pool and stuck his hand in. The water was warm. That was good. The intercom came on. "You must get into the pool." Magnus started breathing heavily, and went into the pool. It came up a little above his waist, so he wasn't as tense. As long as his head wasn't in the water he was alright. But then he started to get nervous. He was in the water for a little to long. He went to get out when the intercom came on again. "Go under the water for as long as you can." Magnus froze and shook his head. He went to get out when he felt something on his leg dragging him down. He was forced under water. Although it was a couple of seconds it felt like eternity.

_Hey. Come on boy, get up." It was about 4 o clock in the morning and young Magnus was still kind of  tired. His mom committed suicide a couple of weeks ago and his stepdad. Let's just say he wasn't in the best mood. But Magnus was young and naive, what did he know. His stepdad took him outside to the lake and roughly grabbed his neck. "It's your fault your mothers dead. This is your punishment" he pushed Magnus's head down in the water and tried to drown him. When he came up for air, his face was stinging from the cold air and water. The man did that a couple more times before he lifted him up and took him in the house. Magnus was sobbing at this point. "Don't cry at me. You deserve this." He threw Magnus down and raped him. Magnus's screams were never heard. It was months before Magnus found his dad dead on the floor. After that, everything was a blur._

____Alec stared at the mirror in horror, but didn't make a sound. How could they do that to him. He watched Magnus crawl out of the pool and onto the hard floor. It took all of his will power not to yell at all the viewers in the room. Imogene shook her head and pressed the button. "It is time for test 2." Alec furrowed his eyes in confusion. There wasn't a second test. There were rounds, but not tests. Alec looked closely at the window when Imogene turned and started to speak.  
"Now you see Mr. Bane is a special case. He has been here for 7 years now. As you saw, he has aquaphobia, but he also has another one. Athazagoraphobia, the fear of being forgotten. Alec was shocked. How is that possible. Imogene answered the question. " According to Mr. Bane's records, he was constantly raped and abused by his Father. After his father died of alcohol abuse a couple years later, Mr. Bane was 6 years old. He was transferred to his grandfather's house in Brooklyn. A year later, his grandfather was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. He slowly forgot who Magnus was. It got so bad that when he saw Magnus he would think Magnus was a thief and throw him on the street. Foster care took Magnus in, and later sent him to us. They noticed when someone forgot his name he panicked or when he was in the bathtub he would freak. So in conclusion, Mr. Bane has two phobias instead of one."  
One of the the men in the room spoke up.  
"How is this possible. How do we know that you are not lying." A small smile appeared on Imogene's face.  
" You know I am not lying because of the tests being run in front of you. And there is a science that goes toward Magnus's dilemma. See he already had one phobia, and that came out of the fear he had for his father. So we're suspecting that the anger from his grandfather triggered his fear of being forgotten. His phobias both originated from the same thing. Fear and Anger. And they both came from male members of his family." The man nodded and write down some notes in his notepad. Imogene turned toward the way I was facing and spoke.  
"It was difficult to find a person who would trigger Magnus's phobia, but we have successfully found someone. Two guards stood came and stood by Imogene.  
"Get him." The Guards came toward me and I ran. Only there was no way to go. They grabbed me and dragged me in front of her.  
"I think you have heard enough. " She grabbed my arm and shoved a needle with clear liquid up my arm. I felt a little woozy, and barely noticed I was put in another room. I looked up and saw a tall Asian boy with black hair, and wet makeup. _Wait. I know him_. I thought to myself. _It starts with an M. Matthew, Malec??? Who is he?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun Dun Dunnn 


	15. Forgetful

Magnus's p.o.v As I hear the door open, I rise to my feet shakily. The intercom said test 2, and I stood frozen in place. I know I should have told people that I have two phobias, but I didn't want to be an outcast. All I need to do is get over one of my fears, and I'll be normal.(Well, as normal as I could get with this thing.) But every time I try to face my fear, I screw it up. But I think I can do it this time. Nobody can forget the amazing Magnus Bane. I look up expecting to see a random classmate, when I see Alexander. Confused I ask," Alexander, what are you doing in here?" I ignored the cold gushy feeling on my body as I walked toward him. I reach out to cup his cheek when he swatted my hand away. "Don't touch me, who are you?" Magnus felt tears swell in his eyes. " Alexander it's me. Magnus." I truly to touch him again but he backs away. " Well, I don't know who you are, but apparently you know me. Don't call me Alexander, only people I'm close to can call me that. I barely know you." Magnus let the tears fall freely now. " Alexand-Alec you have to know me. YOU HAVE TO. You kissed me remember, before testing."Alec had a look of disbelief on his face. "Yeah whatever." He said looking around." Where are the- oh never mind." He started walking toward the doors when I panicked and grabbed his arm. "Alexander please!" I cry out desperately. "Let go of me." He said yanking his arm back knocking me to the ground.

" _Kakek ?" Magnus called out as he went in the house. His grandpa, who was in a rocking chair, looked up surprised. "Hey, who are you, you little rascal. " Magnus got confused at this. "It's me Kakek, Magnus." His grandpa stood up slowly and started to walk toward him."Listen here you little thief. I've been around here a long time, I know what game your playing at. And I know that I've never seen you in my 76 years of living." He grabbed Magnus by his collar and started pushing him toward the door._  
"Now, I don't want to hurt you little boy, so I suggest you get going." Magnus didn't back down. Although the tears were streaming down his face.  
"Kakek. You know me. I'm your grandson." The old man pushed Magnus out the door and yelled.  
"Stay out you little punk. If I see you by my house again, you will regret it! Now leave!!" He slammed the door and left Magnus outside. He started beating on the door. " You have to know me. Please remember me!" Magnus pleaded.  
"Kakek!!!"  
The door opened, but instead of a hug, he got a slap to the face. Magnus looked up through his tears to see an angry face looking down on him. Magnus ran away crying with one hand on his cheek. A couple of weeks later he was put in foster care. He never saw his grandpa again.

 _"_ I'm so sorry." He said quickly. He helped me up and turned around. "I really do have to go though." He said softly. He walked out of the doors that left out of the room. At least he still has his heart of gold I think before I start crying. I can't believe he forgot me. I love him. I get angry and turn towards the window.  
"You Have Fail-"  
"No. I HAVE NOT FAILED!!" I yell. I Will pass this test. I HAVE TO.  
"Go ahead an take his memory. I'll just start over with him. I will NOT be forgotten." The intercom went off for a couple of seconds. "You have passed the test. You may leave." I run out and go straight to my dorm. I sit there and cry with a bittersweet feeling.  
\----------------------------------------------

_While all of this was occurring, Alec was snapping out of his daze. When he walked out of the door, he was taken by the gaurds again. They inserted some purple liquid into his system instead of clear. The memories came back to him at the speed of light. He had a headache pounding in his head. Then he remembered Magnus. What had he done. He saw Magnus run past him. Getting over himself he runs to catch up with him.  
\----------------------------------------------_

I passed yet I lost Alexander. I sat there wallowing in my sadness when I heard a knock on the door. I was about to say come in, but Alexander barged in the door. I give him a small smile.  
"I'm so sorry for earlier." He came up to me and kissed me. He then pulled me into a hug. " Im so sorry baby. I don't know what happened I just forgot everything, and I pushed you to the ground, and I hurt you and you cried. I'm just so sorry Magnus." I shake away all the sadness I had before. "Baby huh?"  
"Shut up, I'm trying here." We start laughing and he grabs my hand. He started to frown.  
"What?" I said with concern.  
"When you were testing, I was in the viewing room. I saw everything. They could've killed you Magnus." I sigh and pause for a minute.  
"It was ok Alexander. I'm fine now aren't I?"  
"But Imogene. She said you have two phobias. How is that possible?"  
"I'm afraid your going to have to ask Ragnor for that sweetie." I try to make him laugh but his frown wouldn't budge. My smile drops and I try to explain it the best I can.  
"Apparently both of my best phobias sprouted from the fear I had for my family. Basically 2 birds in one nest." Alexanders lips twitches.  
"Birds?"  
"Oh you know what I mean." We both start laughing and he reaches over and cups my face.  
It's ok, I don't love you any less than I did before." He pecks on the lips.  
"The others are in the other room, we should go see if they're alright."  
"Yeah." We walk out hand in hand. For the first time in a while, I'm not thinking about fears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy ending. Well for this chapter. Hope you like it.
> 
> Kakek is grandpa in Indonesian


	16. Touching Problems

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is kinda based on Saphael. I'm writing this in Math Counts class, so I was kinda rushed.

Alec went to the door and opened it for Magnus. Magnus smiled and said " Well Alexander. I didn't know you could be such a gentlemen."  
They both laughed and walked into the door. Their smiles fell as they viewed all their friends in the room. Jace was cradling Clary who had her face in his neck. She was shaking and twitching from time to time. Raphael and Simon sat by each other but didn't touch. Raphael had his head down, while Simon was sniffing. Alec saw Simon reach his hand out to touch Raphael, but Raphael scooted away. Catarina was leaning against Ragnor who was mouthing the numbers of pi. Izzy and Maia being the only single people in the group were comforting each other. That was the first time Magnus saw Izzy and Maia that close. Magnus saw Alec go and sit in between Izzy and Maia putting his arms around both of them. Magnus smiled and couldn't help but think about Alec's big heart. Most people would just comfort their sibling, but Alec was like a big brother to Maia also. Smiling Magnus walked over to Ragnor and Catarina. He smelt a strong smell of Germ X and assumed it came from Catarina. He bent down eye level to Catarina.   
"Hey Cat, you'll be ok. It's ok." Catarina looked up with tear stains on her face, and nodded. He rose up a little.  
"Ragnor, you have nothing to worry about my friend. You are the smartest person I know. There is possibly nothing else that you need to learn." Ragnor gave a nod of thanks, and Magnus decided that he had had enough.  
"You know, it is a bit dreary up in here. Testing is finally over, and all ya'll want to do is sit around in your sadness. Well I say we do what I do best. Throw a party." Everybody looked at him for a second until Alec stood up.  
" You know Magnus is right. We should probably just let go already and have a little fun." Everybody was shocked that of all people, Alec wanted to throw a party. Izzy smiled and stood up, bringing Maia up as well.  
"I could party. I didn't know that you were the party type big brother. " she paused and started chuckling. " You know if you wanted to get down and dirty with Magnus, you could've just told us to get out." Alec blushed but tried and failed to cover it up.  
"I-I do not!" Every started laughing and Magnus walked up and whispered into Alec's ear.  
" If you wanted to get alone with me, you could've just asked darling." This only made Alec blush harder, and Magnus was already halfway out the door.   
" Come on everyone, party in my dorm." Ragnor made a horrified look.   
" Umm I am all for a party, but the last time it was in our dorm we almost destroyed the whole building. Don't ask." Ragnor said at Alec's look. Everyone walked out of the room, well every one except Simon and Raphael.   
" Hey, ya'll coming." Izzy said as she turned and looked back at them.  
" Yeah we'll be back in a minute." Simon said bitterly. Everyone wasn't sure about leaving them together, but Izzy knew the look on Simon's face.  
" Come on guys, they'll be out in a minute." Everyone walked out the door with worried looks on their faces. Izzy looked back in the room one last time as she closed the door behind her. Raphael gets up and starts walking toward the door when Simon just explodes.   
"WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!" Simon yelled at Raphael. This just fed Raphael's anger.   
"WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME!? WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!" Raphael yelled back with just as much fury.   
" YOU WON'T LET ME DO ANYTHING! I CAN'T HUG YOU, KISS YOU, I CAN'T DO ANYTHING!!" Simon said.  
" YOU THINK I WANT TO LIVE MY LIFE LIKE THIS? I WANT TO BE ABLE TO DO ALL THIS STUFF TOO." Simon grabbed the nearest thing to him, which was a glass cup and threw it into the wall.  
" WHY CAN'T WE BE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.'' Raphael got a cold look on his face, and lowered his voice.  
"Be like everyone else. Says the boy who can't be alone in the room for ten seconds." Simon looked down.  
" Well you can't be touched, my condition is better than yours." Raphael walked over to Simon and slapped him. HARD.   
"Well you don't have to worry about 'being touched anymore."' Simon grabbed his cheek and watched Raphael walk toward the door.   
"Wait! You can't do this. Raphael I'm sorry." Raphael stopped and took a deep breath. He turned around.   
" I think we need some time apart Simon. We'll still be dating, but I need my space. I'll start being by you in two weeks." With that Raphael turned around and walked out the door. Simon, being left alone went into the bathroom and shut the door. He slid down the bathroom door hyperventilating. He couldn't take it, he NEEDED Raphael. He loved him, yet he hurt him. Simon went through the bathroom cabinet looking, searching. He needed a release. He found what he was looking for. A RAZOR. He was 3 years clean, but his streak was about to be broken. He pushed the razor against his arm, and watched the blood flow smoothly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UH OH. I'M SO SORRY, I LOVE YOU GUYS


	17. IM SO SORRY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE READ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I'm just now seeing that all of my chapters have been cut off. My Wattpad is GeekyAngelo, and the story is on there. I've been moving the stories from my wattpad to my a03 acount, and I guess some of it has been cut off along the way. So to see all of it it's on my Wattpad. I am so sorry and I hope this helps.


	18. Bathroom floor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I couldn't finish. The bell just rung for school.

_He couldn't take it, he NEEDED Raphael. He loved him, yet he hurt him. Simon went through the bathroom cabinet looking, searching. He needed a release. He found what he was looking for. A RAZOR. He was 3 years clean, but his streak was about to be broken. He pushed the razor against his arm, and watched the blood flow smoothly._

 

A couple of minutes later Simon passed out. Lets just say Raphael was just a little bit worried.

"Dios, where is Simon. It's been 10 minutes now." Alec rolled his eyes and huffed.

"You know how Simon is. He's probably just fantasizing of Loki or something." Raphael looked offended at this.

" So... you're basically telling me that Simon would rather be with Loki than me?"

"Welll.... I mean Loki is pretty hot..."

" Um excuse me Alexander, what did you just say?" Magnus cut in. Izzy smiled and started walking toward Magnus.

"You have to admit that Loki is pretty hot."

"Someone hotter than I. Please, it is hard to achieve such perfection."

" Oh my dear friend, you are sadly mistaken. And for the record, Loki is a God, not a human." Ragnor said exasperatedly.

" So you are calling me a God?"

"To all the things that is good, it is truly revolting to imagine dating someone hundreds of years older than you." Magnus smirked.

"Well Alexander might like them a little seasoned. Don't you Alexander?" 

"I-I don't know." Everyone started laughing hysterically while Raphael was pacing back and forth. 

"You guys I'm serious. I guess it's kind of my fault since I said we needed some time apart and he just-"

" Wait. You guys BROKE UP!!!" Izzy said incredulously.

"No. I just said we needed time apart. All I said was two weeks." Catarina sighed with her eyes closed. 

"You know that technically means 'we are breaking up' right?" Izzy rushed toward the door.

"Well don't just stand there, lets go. NOW!!!!!" They all run back to the room where they just were, and went straight for the bathroom. Raphael pushed Izzy out of the way and mumbled a quick sorry. He tugged on the door but it wouldn't budge. " Simon baby open the door." There was no reply, and this made Raphael even more scared. 

"Simon please!!" Still no response. Raphael pushed his shoulder against the wall and bust it open. There lied Simon unconscious on the floor. But they didn't know that.


	19. Heating things up

Everybody rushed around trying to get things to help Simon. Well everybody except Magnus. This annoyed Raphael who was by Simon's side pressing tissue against his wounds.  
"Come on Bane help me with this." Alec was the only one who looked at Magnus to see that he was terrified. He was pale and his hands were shaking slightly. Magnus walked over and crouched down next to Raphael looking as scared as Hell. Of course Raphael didn't notice. "Put your hands here. Now Bane." Everybody stopped for a brief second to look, and then went back to what they were doing. Magnus put his clammy hands over the wound with the towel he had. His hands were shaking so much that he accidentally opened the wound a little more. Simon groaned and opened his eyes a little. Nobody noticed this except Magnus.   
" Thank God Simon," Magnus whispered," I'm so happy your alive, we need your good spirits here." Too weak to do anything, Simon gave a small smile.Magnus smiled to himself thankful that he was ok. But Raphael took this the wrong way.  
"What the f*** are you laughing at, you just opened the wound?!" Magnus tried to explain himself and replaced the cloth.  
"Umm well, Simon he..." Magnus saying Simon's name set him off.  
"No! You know what just get out! We don't need you here." Magnus looked hurt for a split second then put up his guarded facade.  
"You guys will need all the help you can get just let me do som-"  
"OH MY GOD!!!" Raphael shouted.   
"FOR ONCE IN YOUR PATHETIC LIFE CAN YOU JUST SHIT UP AND GET OUT!!!" Everybody was silent for a minute, and looked at Magnus.He still kept his guarded look up.   
"Contrary to what you believe Raphael," he said with a blank face," I am not going to leave when my friend is unconscious bleeding out on the floor." Raphael had a look on his face that no one had ever seen. And not in a good way.   
"Your phobias water right?" He said with a tight voice."   
"Why are you asking when you obviously know the answer." Raphael smirked and walked over to the tiny sink in the bedroom. He grabbed and extended the handle and turned the water on the hottest level he could. He sprayed Magnus, but Magnus didn't falter.  
"If you think that little spray of water is going to get me then-Ahhhh!!!" Raphael went to Magnus and sprayed the water on his face, which was now boiling hot.  
"RAPHAEL STOP!!!!" Clary screamed and went over to try to take the faucet. He pushed her back and she fell and twisted her ankle.  
"Ahh!" She screamed out more with surprise than pain. Raphael took a deep breath and turned off the water and calmly put it back.  
Everyone looked mad. Especially Ragnor and Catarina. He shrugged and went over to Simon. During the whole argument Catarina surprisingly stitched up the cuts. He talked to Catarina, not taking his eyes off of Simon.   
"I thought you didn't like doctor stuff." Seething with anger she replied.  
"Simon isn't sick, he's hurt." She turned to Magnus to find him not there.   
"Where's Magnus?" She asked frantically.   
"Him and Alec went out a minute ago." Jace said.   
"You should be ashamed of yourself." Catarina said to Raphael.  
"I was protecting him."  
"From what?! If anything YOU are the one he needs protecting from."  
"Did you see Magnus. He opened Simon's cut and started laughing. And your calling me sick. No I was right about Magnus, he was trouble from the start!" Everybody was about to start a yelling match when Raphael heard a weak no. He looked back and noticed Simon awake. Raphael smiled with relief and reached out to grab Simon's hand just to have Simon move his hand. Raphael frowned.  
"I-I saw how you treated Magnus. You overreacted for no reason at all."  
"No reason?" Raphael asked incredulously," He was laughing at your pain Si."  
"Don't Si me. He was laughing because I was ok. I woke up and Magnus was right there. You were talking about something, and Magnus told me he was happy I was alive. He was laughing because when I groaned because he made the wrong move, he knew I was alive. But you were too ignorant to see it."  
"Simon. I'm so sorry." he said.  
"I'm not the one you need to be apologizing to." Everyone say there in stunned silence . Meanwhile, another heartbreaking conversation was going on in Alec's room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hate me. Don't forget to like and comment ☺️


	20. Forgiveness

  
"Magnus. Magnus!" Alec called after him trying to catch up. Magnus turns around, his eyes glossy.  
"What Alec. What could you possibly want."  
Alec sighed. It hurt him so much to see Magnus like this.  
"Can we just talk. Please." Magnus crossed his arms.  
"Ok fine. Let's go to my room." Alec paused for a minute.  
"No... Let's go to my room. It's farther away and we're less likely to be bothered." Magnus rolled his eyes. The action made a tear fall down his face as he walked over to Alec. Alec wiped away the tear and gave Magnus a kiss on the cheek.  
" Hey, we're going to be ok. Everything is going to be okay."  
"Yeah whatever you say." Alec grabbed Magnus's hand, and they walked toward his room.  
\------------Time skip 3 minutes later-------------  
Alec opened the door for Magnus as they both walked in. After the door was shut Alec immediately started rambling.  
"Hey, what happened with Simon wasn't your fault, you were scared-"  
"Alec."  
"Hell we all were scared and thats saying a lot and Raphael was just really worried and he-"  
"Alec"  
"Really cares about Simon but I'm sure he didn't mean what he said and-"  
" _Alexander_!!" Alec looks up from his rambling to see Magnus with his eyes shut and fists balled up. Alec immediately felt bad. He went over and engulfed Magnus in a hug. Magnus pushed him away softly and sat down on the bed.  
"Alexander it wasn't just because Simon was bleeding out. The blood... a-and the razor. It just brought back so many memories."  
Alec grabbed Magnus's hand silently urging him to continue.  
"When I was younger my mom committed suicide. Nobody knows a motive... she was always happy always smiling. When I found her she was already barely alive, but the blood. There was so much Alexander.... I tried to save her, I tried to cover the wounds but it didn't work. She was so happy, just like Simon. I-I don't want him to end up like my mom Alec... I just, I wouldn't be able to bear it." Alec now had tears in his eyes also.  
"When Raphael yelled at me....I was so scared... I couldn't move. After I found my Mom, my stepdad came in later and yelled at me the same way. No matter how hard I tried to help her wounds, it didn't work. He blamed me for not holding the cloth correctly and blamed me for her death. He was right. When Raphael yelled at me it just brought me back. I'm sorry."  
Alec shook his head.  
"No, you tried your best. When bad things happen people try to find someone to blame. It wasn't your fault. You did what you were supposed to do, but ignorant people like your stepfather and Raphael just couldn't see that."  
Magnus looked up as Alec grabbed his face and pulled him in for a kiss. When they broke apart, a knock was heard on the door.  
"It's open!" Alec yelled out. At that moment Raphael came in. Magnus looked down while Alec put his hand on Magnus's.  
"What are you doing here?" Alec asked.  
"I came to apologize for my behavior. I was just worried about Simon. I didn't mean to hurt you I just- I couldn't lose him." Magnus looked up at him and stood up dropping Alec's hand.  
"It's ok. I forgive you. I wouldn't be able to be patient if I was put in that situation either. I can't say I know what you're feeling right now, but I know what it's like to almost lose someone." Raphael gave a small smile and did the unexpected. He ran over and hugged Magnus. A full on hug. Magnus was shocked for a second but returned the gesture. Alec was smiling in the background. Raphael broke it off.  
"Well I'm going to the infirmary. We managed to carry Simon there. I'll leave you guys to it." As he walked out he may or may not have wiped a couple of stray tears off of his cheeks.  
Alec just smiled at Magnus.  
"Wow. I never thought I'd see the day where Raphael Santiago was hugging Magnus Bane."  
"Oh be quiet." Magnus said playfully. While laughing a couple more tears came out of his eyes. Alec wiped them away and kissed him. And for that moment it was just them, and nothing else mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to leave kudos and comments 


	21. Recovery

It took Magnus and Alec 20 minutes before they decided to leave. When they got to the hospital wing everybody else was already there.  Raphael was clutching Simon's hand, and Clary  and Jace were on the other side of the bed while everyone else was sitting down. When they walked, everybody turned and looked at them.  
"Hey, how is he?" Alec said pulling up a chair.  
"He's going to be fine, they stitched up all the wounds."  
"That's good." Magnus said looking for a chair.   
"Here you can have mine, there aren't any more." Izzy said.  
"What, oh no. I don't even need a chair really, you don't have to get up." Magnus said.  
"Umm, I'll just..oh!" Magnus leaned back on the wall, just to find out it was farther than he thought. When he was going back, Alec pulled his hips and planted him on his lap. Magnus looked up st him with his eyebrows raised. Alec just started blushing.  
"Well...umm.. I didn't want you to fall so.."   
"It's ok, this is more comfortable than standing up." Alec's face turned red and all eyes were on them.  
"Awww that's so sweet. You two are like super man and Lois Lane, but you know...dudes." Everyone looked back and Simon was smiling. Jace smirked." Even when your injured you still talk about nerdy stuff."  
"Hey some of that stuff is cool.. poison ivy is one of my fav.."   
"Ok enough of that everybody move I need to take a picture." Clary said moving everyone. She took a picture of Simon and looked at it satisfied.  
"I enjoy the picture Fray, but why?"  
"Because," she started ," this picture proves that you made it, and that you held on." Simon's smile faltered a little bit stayed up.   
"Hey can we have the room for a couple of minutes?" Raphael said. Everybody filed out of the room muttering 'sure' and 'of course'. When the door was shut, Simon sat up a little.  
"You're holding my hand. I'm proud of you this is awesome."  
"You shouldn't be." Raphael said. Simon gave a confused look.  
" I mean, I've been mean to you this entire time, and you say you're proud of me? All I'm doing is holding your hand, you can easily go to someone else and do more and..."  
"Hey let me stop you right there. I haven't been playing fair either. I know your fear, and I shouldn't have went off like that. I guess I just felt like.. you were repulsed at me or something. I don't know." Raphael gave a look of horror at this.  
"I could never. I just... have a lot of emotions and they just get to me. I'm sorry."  
" It's ok Raph, were getting better everyday right?" Raphael nodded and took a deep breath.  
" Speaking of getting better, you know we need to talk about it right."  
"There's nothing to talk about, I guess it was just a relapse, it's not that big of a deal."  
"Not that big of a deal?" Raphael said with disbelief," Simon you almost died. I could've lost you forever. How can you say that?" Simon could see the tears brimming in Raphael's eyes. He looked up to escape his gaze.  
"I'm fine now aren't I? We should just forget about that and move on ok."  
"Forget about it?! Simon how could I, Simon just give me something, just tell me why you did it. Was it a trigger, was it me? Just please give me something so I can make this right."  
Simon wasn't smiling at all and wiped his eyes before the tears could fall.  
"Why do you care?"At this Raphael shot up from his seat.  
"Why do I care?! Because I Love You Simon. I love the way you ramble on about movies, I love the way you smile when your passionate about something, I love the focused look on your face when your writing your songs..I-I love how your patient with me. You never push me to do anything I don't want to do. I Love you Simon Lewis. And I would die without you so please tell me whats wrong." There were tears falling from his face and he wiped them all away. Simon looked down.  
"When you walked off, I was alone. I thought you hated me, I love you and I can't bear the thoughts being alone. A world without you is one I don't want to be in. I was just about to  make a few cuts, but I got carried away. I'm sorry."  
"So it's my fault." Raphael stumbled back into the chair. "Oh my God it's my fault."   
"Raphael no. It's mine." Raphael shook his head.   
"I shouldn't have left you, I-I failed you." Simon sat up a little more.  
"Raphael come here please." Simon grabbed both of his hands and looked in his eyes.  
"It was my fault, I shouldn't have even let my mind drift to that place. I know you would never do anything to hurt me. I love you so much. Is it ok if I hug you? Raphael wrapped his arms around Simon and Simon gratefully hugged back. Simon pulled away first and yawned.  
"Simon you should go to sleep. You need your rest." Raphael said letting his hand go.  
"Don't leave." Simon said.   
"I would never."  He went on the other side of the bed. "I've been working really hard to get over my fear and I think it's about time I put all my hard work to action." He went in the bed and grabbed Simon's hips pulling him close. Simon smiled and let his eyes drift shut. Raphael fell asleep for shortly after. Everybody came in and looked at them with smiles on their faces. Deciding to not wake them, everybody left. After snapping a picture of course.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave kudos and comments


	22. Misunderstanding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's kinda short ☹️

Of course after Raphael and Simon woke up no one told them about the pictures. And when they found out about them Raphael totally wasn't blushing. It was about time for them each to go back to their rooms and they hesitantly went. Once going to his room Alec flopped down on the bed.   
"It's been a long day." Alec said flopping over with his head face first into the pillow.   
"You ain't lyin" Jace said going over to Alec's bed. He moved next to Alec and laid down. At this Alec turned his head a little.   
"You know you have a perfectly good bed over there right?" Jace took a deep breath.   
"I think I want to break up with Clary." Alec shot up and looked at Jace like he had just commuted murder.   
"Before I call you a stupid jerk,oops too late, why in heaven's name would you want to do that." Jace signed closing his eyes and scooted closer to Alec. It looked like he was just on his back asleep, but only Alec could see the tension in his shoulders.  
"I mean...Just think about it. She deserves better. You know."   
"No, I don't know. There is no better. I don't like you, but you know I used to. Jace I don't know what makes you think that. Your confident, handsome, and surprisingly smart."  
"Surprisingly?" Jace said with his eyebrows raises.   
"Yeah. I've always been smarter than you, but you know. Your behind me...and Izzy." Jace rolled his eyes.  
"But seriously though. What makes you want to break up with her. You love her and she loves you, what else is there to it."   
"Our fears." He said pausing.  
"Yeah so we still have to get over our fears, but we all have them, and it's ok."   
"That's just it Alec. It's not ok!" Jace said."Every girl wants a boyfriend who can protect them no matter the cost. And if all the lights go off I just go into a panic attack. She needs better." Jace said bitterly. Alec shook his head.  
"No. That's not true. You two are perfect for each other. So what your afraid of the dark. Even then, you will always protect her. And like I said before you love her. You guys may never find anyone else that will give you the same love y'all have for each other. It's ok." There were a few stray tears on Jace's cheeks.  
"Yeah your right. I was stupid."  
"No you weren't. It's ok to be insecure sometimes."  
"Thanks Alec."  
"That's what brothers are for." Alec said reaching and wiping the tears off of Jace's face.   
"Oh yeah and about you being smarter than me. I can beat your a** with one hand tied behind my back." As they both started laughing a tear came down Jace's face.  
"You really need to stop crying." He said laughing reaching over again wiping the tear away. Suddenly the door opened.  
"Hey Alexander I was thinking maybe we cou-" he stopped mid sentence when he saw Alec and Jace. They were both on the bed super close, and Alec was caressing Jace's cheek.  
"How could you!" Alec was confused until suddenly it dawned on him how they looked.  
"Wait no, Magnus this isn't what it looks like."   
"Save it. Don't come near me ever again." With that Magnus slammed the door. Alec already up started pacing. Jace just stood there with his eyebrows raised.  
"Dude your screwed." Alec just turned and looked at him.  
"So are you, you know he's gonna tell Catarina whose gonna tell Ragnor, then Raphael, then Simon, then Clary." With that he rushed out the door accidentally slamming it as he rushed out.  
"Oh Sh*t" Jace said as he started to get up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave kudos and comments


	23. Misunderstanding Sucks

Magnus slammed the door behind him as he went in the room. Tears were threatening to come out of his eyes. He started pacing and let his thoughts get to him. Of course Alexander was cheating on him. He was fat, ugly, the whole lot. At that moment Ragnor came out of the bathroom with a towel drying off his hair.  
"Hey I heard you come i- woah what happened to you?" Magnus was pretty sure that his eyeliner was running and his makeup was smeared. Magnus sniffed and waved him off.  
"Oh nothing my little cabbage. I uh-was just getting my make up of. As you can see it doesn't quite come off with out make up remover." Ragnor gave a disgusted look at the nickname but looked at Magnus closely. Magnus tried to give one of his 1 million dollar smile but failed miserably. Ragnor rolled his eyes and sat down in the chair by his mini-desk full off books about geography,history, and any other boring thing he wanted to know.  
"Look whatever your fretting about, your probably just overreacting. Just lie down and relax, you'll feel better in the morning." Magnus sighed.  
"You know I'll go take a shower first." Ragnor nodded closing his eyes.  
"Hey you wanna go check on Cat before you lie down." Ragnor huffed and sat upright.  
"I'm pretty sure she's fine. She's probably asleep." Magnus used this to his advantage.  
" Pretty sure? Probably? That doesn't sound like a definite answer my friend. And plus women love a man who does things like that."  
Ragnor grumbled a little but got up and walked out the door. Magnus then went into the bathroom and turned on the shower. He looked under the cabinet to find nothing. No razors, shavers. Nothing.  
"Damn Alexander." He mumbled as he continued looking. He then heard the door slam front door slam open loudly. He got up to see who it was just to see Alexander. Well Alec. Magnus hurriedly locked the bathroom door and sunk down to a sitting position on the floor. He then heard beating on the bathroom door.  
"Magnus Please! Just let me explain!" Alec said pounding on the door.  
"Explain what?! " Magnus called back," Explain how you cheated on me with that dumb blonde?!!" Magnus shouted angrily.  
"No that's not what happened. Magnus Please!" Alec shouted.  
"I don't like Jace like that! I love you and you only. I would never cheat on you!" Alec said his voice cracking.  
"You used to like Jace didn't you? Those feelings probably resurfaced for all I know!" Magnus's voice started cracking as well. You can start to hear the desperation in Alec's voice.  
"Magnus I only love you. What happened back there, I was only wiping away Jace's tears and giving him advice. Magnus you know I would never hurt you." Magnus faltered a little.  
"What was he crying about?" Magnus asked sniffing.  
"That's his secret to tell. Magnus please believe me. I love you so much."  
"I believe you." Magnus whispered. He got up and unlocked the door. The door bust open and Alec came in in a frenzy. He pulled Magnus into a tight hug.  
"Magnus I'm so sorry you thought I cheated on you. I never want you to think that. I would never hurt you."  
"I know I'm sorry." Magnus said sniffing. Alec went over and turned the water off in the shower.  
"Don't be sorry. It's not your fault." Alec went over to sit on Magnus's bed and pat beside him. Magnus sat down next to him sniffing.  
"I love you so much Magnus." Alec said pulling Magnus in another hug.  
"I love you too Alexander. Magnus said wiping his eyes. At that moment Alec chuckled.  
"What's so funny?" Magnus asked with a puzzled look. Alec smiled cupping Magnus's cheek.  
" It would just be stupid to cheat on you. What's the point of downgrading that much when I already have the most beautiful, smart, talented boyfriend in the universe." Magnus chuckled too.  
"Well I am a queen after all." Magnus said.  
"I love you." Alec said dreamily. Magnus smiled and leaned in to kiss him. Alec kissed back with just as much passion tangling his fingers into Magnus's hair, pulling him in closer. They broke apart with goofy smiles on their faces.  
"I-I think I want to take the next step." Alec said nervously. "I-I mean it's not just about what I want it's about you too of course and if you don't want to I completely under-"  
Magnus shut him up with a kiss.  
"Your rambling darling." Magnus said." And I would love to do this with you. But are you ready?" Alec smirked and pulled Magnus in for a heated kiss. Magnus pushed him down playfully and got on top of him. Their kiss got more heated until Alec rolled up Magnus's shirt urging him to take his shirt off. Magnus pulled it overhead and leaned back down. Alec took off his shirt and pulled him closer. Alec's hands went to Magnus's sides and froze. Magnus then got up and covered his sides.  
"I-I'm sorry Alexander. I have scars everywhere. I understand if you want to stop." Magnus said holding back tears. Alec reached up and cupped Magnus's cheek.  
"Magnus your scars make you who you are. And that is the man I love. Your still the most beautiful person in the world. " Magnus allowed himself to get pulled back into a heated kiss. Magnus let his hands drift lower and lower until-.  
"Hey guys I just want to say so-OH MY GOD!" Jace said as he processed what was in front of him. Magnus rolled his eyes and moved next to Alec. Magnus acted cool where Alec was as red as a tomato.  
"What do you want Jace?" Magnus said impatiently. Jace gave Magnus a deer in the headlights look before he shook out of it and started rambling.  
"All I just want to say that I'm sorry cause you probably think Alec was cheating on you with me but-"  
"Jace."  
"I would never do that. He's my brother and I love him but I don't swing that way and you two do and-"  
"Jace."  
"It's pretty obvious that you two love each other and I love Clary. You know Clary and I are like soulmates and I love her so I wouldn't-"  
"JACE!" Magnus yelled. He shut up and looked at him."It's ok. I know it just looked bad, and I didn't tell Clary." Jace had a relieved look and sighed.  
"That's good. Well I'm just gonna leave now." He smirked and opened the door. He then turned around.  
"Don't be up all night Alec. Use protection." This impossibly made Alec blush harder. He was about to walk out when Simon ran into him.  
"Oh hey I'm sorry have any of you seen Raph...ael?" Simon said looking at Magnus and  
Alec.  
"Oh were you two... ohhhh I'm sorry. Go head on Alec." Simon said smiling. Magnus got off the bed and put his shirt on. He grabbed Alec's shirt and threw it across the room.  
"Magnus!" Alec yelled. Magnus smirked.  
"What? You have horrible fashion sense. And plus you look better without a shirt." Magnus winked at Alec and went and got one of his shirts.  
"Here wear this instead." Magnus gave Alec a shirt with Bootylicious in red sparkles on the front of it. Alec blushed but put it on anyway. "Well since you two interrupted our time together theres no point in lying down." Magnus then looked at Simon up and down.  
"Speaking of lying down. Why aren't you in the infirmary." Simon looked worried.  
"When I woke up Raphael wasn't there. So I went to look for him and no ones seen him."  
"I'm sure he's just in the bathroom or something." Simon shook his head.  
"No he would've left a note or something. He wouldn't just leave me there alone." Magnus wiped his hands on his jeans.  
"Well I'm up for an adventure. Let's go find him." Everyone agreed of course...except Alec.  
"You guys we could get in trouble for this." Magnus grabbed his hand.  
"It'll be fine. This is one of the rules they don't enforce that much."  
"Yeah your right." Alec grumbled. With that they headed out into the hallway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CLIFFHANGER please leave kudos and comments


	24. The Cross

Alec, Magnus, Simon, and Jace all walked down the hallway quietly. Even though they didn't care much about the rules, they still didn't want to get caught.   
"You know he could've went down to get food, exercise, visit people. There are millions of reasons why he wasn't in his room."  Magnus said. Simon shook his head.   
"No. It's not like him. He wouldn't just leave me a-alone."  Magnus and Alec shared a worried glance as they went farther down the hallway.   
"Ummm you guys, maybe we should turn back. It's really dark in here." Simon and Magnus just realized how Jace was clutching Alec's arm.  
"Here you can use the flashlights my phone. It's really bright and should light up a lot." Jace let go of Alec's arm to grab the phone.  
"Thanks." Simon nodded as Jace walked a little ahead, the phone tight in his hand.  
"So Alexander."  
Magnus purred. "Would you like to go on a date tomorrow. Preferably fine dining." Alec blushed smiling.  
"H-How would you do that? W-We can't leave." Alec said.   
"I have my ways."Magnus said with a smirk. " Also I would like to continue what we were doing before Jace interrupted us."   
"Magnus!" Alec shouted covering his face.  
"What? I'm just telling you the benefits of going on a date with my marvelous self." Alec groaned and Simon looked confused.   
"Wait, what happened. What did Jace walk in on you two doing?" Jace looked at him with eyebrows raised. "What? I just don't know wha-ohhhh. OH MY GOD." Simon said smiling. Alec looked down once more trying to hid his red cheeks. "You two were- Wait Jace you walked in?" Simon said staring at Jace.  
"Sadly." he replied.   
"So who was on top? I mean that's the way it works, and since you-"  
"No!!" Jace shouted stopping him mid sentence. "The last thing I want to do is remember that." Magnus rolled his eyes, grabbed Alec's hand, and dragged him along. "So is that a yes or a no. I didn't really get a straight answer." Magnus asked Alec.  
"That's because he's gay." Simon said before cracking up. Everybody looked at him. "Y-You get it. H-He can't think straight." Jace snorted and brushed past him. Simon huffed and walked behind him. "Y'all should really enjoy my sense of humor." Alec rolled his eyes and walked beside Magnus. "Soooo?" Magnus said.  
"Oh u-um yeah. That would be grea- I mean I would love too. " Magnus smiled and gave him a peck on the lips.   
"Ew you guys I heard that."   
"Oh please it's better than what you and Jace do at ni-"   
"Ok!" Alec yelled stopping them. "Let's keep going. I'm about ready to sleep." Everybody mumbled an ok and kept walking.   
"Ugh where is he?" Simon groaned. 1 MINUTE LATER.   
"Simon it's been like 10 minutes. The last time you talked was 30 seconds ago. Shut up." Jace said irritated.   
"Shut don't go up ur god sidewa-ahhh."  
Simon tripped and fell. Jace started laughing while Magnus was at least trying to hold their laughter. Alec being the only mature one didn't laugh. "Hey, you ok?" Alec asked. Simon who was rubbing his ankle.   
"Yeah I guess." Simon said. That's when Magnus started laughing harder. Alec and Simon glared at him.  
"What? I had to make sure he was ok before I started laughing." Magnus said.   
"You know your being able to trip on a necklace  interests me." Jace said.   
"A necklace?" Simon said looking down. He gasped jumping up with the necklace in hand.   
"What?" Jace said.  
"This is Raphael's! He's in trouble!" Magnus stepped up.   
"Raphael could have just dropped it, and plus how do you even know it's his." Simon still frantic tried to explain.  
"He always has it. He was raised a catholic, was in a catholic school. The whole lot. His magic mom gave him this cross, he wouldn't just lose it." Simon said.   
"Ok before we go like chickens with our heads cut off we should go meet the others, get some rest, and skip school to figure this out."  
"Wait. Skip school." Alec said.  
"Yes Alexander, this is more important. Wouldn't you agree." Alec slightly nodded.  
"But Raphael-"   
"Raphael would be fine. I'm pretty sure wherever he is, he wouldn't want you to stress yourself this much." Simon nodded.   
"Ok. Let's go wake everyone up shall we." Magnus said turning, and heading back. Jace and Alec followed. Simon went last, clutching the cross in his hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please vote and comment. I just came from a camp, so I couldn't post as much. But the good news is... I WON A SCHOLARSHIP and I haven't even started high school yet.


	25. Update

Hey on the past chapters that were cut off, I went back and fixed them. Just go back to the ones that seemed cut off. Such as you have failed part 2


	26. Sleep is good

“HEY CABBAGE! WAKE UP!!” Magnus yelled his patience wearing thin. Behind him Clary and Catarina were fighting to stay awake. Maia...she gave up half way down the hallway. She was standing with her blanket wrapped around her. Her head was on Izzy’s shoulder despite Izzy’s protests. Ragnor grumbled a little before getting out of bed.  
“OKAY! Now that everyone is awake it’s time for a meeting.” Everybody groaned. Even Alec.  
“How about we go back to sleep and talk about, whatever this is tomorrow.” Izzy said..we’ll complained yawning.  
“Raphael’s missing.” Magnus said.   
“Wait what?” Izzy said instantly waking up, which bothered Maia.   
“Yeah we found this in the hallway, and he just didn’t show up, so yeah.” Simon said.  
“He could’ve just dropped it.” Ragnor said irritated.   
“He wouldn’t just drop it.” Simon said getting a little ticked off. “We need to go find him cause I will not go back to my room alone.” Everybody quieted down.   
“Well I don’t know about you guys, but I saw we should start looking.” Everybody nodded, or was just trying to keep their head up. Alec being the big brother of course had to step in.   
“Look I know we all want to find Raphael, but we do need sleep.”  
“Well I don’t, I’ll keep looking. I’ll meet up with y’all in the morn-“   
“Simon no.” Alec said interrupting him. “ Raphael would want you to sleep.”  
“Well we don’t know what Raphael wants because HE’S NOT HERE!” Simon shouted.  
“Well think about it like this. Even if we do go looking for him, we’d be too tired to even function. If we get some rest we have a better chance of finding him. Right?” Simon put his eyes down.  
“Yeah. I guess.”   
“So we’ll meet up tomorrow.” Everybody nodded and started to head out.   
“Wait a minute.” Simon said grabbing Alec.   
“Can I stay with you until Raphael comes back. Please.”   
“Sure. Whatever you need. Come on.” They headed off and Ragnor was already asleep. Magnus climbed in bed thinking of how considerate Alec was. 

Of course Jace was already asleep when Simon and Alec walked in.   
“Hey umm you can take my bed and I’ll get the floor.” Simon’s eyebrows furrowed.   
“What no I couldn’t.”   
“You need sleep more than me.”  
“But the floor? You need sleep too.” Alec smiled. “It’s fine, I have a bed. I’ll be back in the morning.”   
Simon still looked very confused. Alec leaned over and whispered in his ear, then left. Simon got in the bed smiling from ear to ear. He was not gonna let Alec live this down.

Alec slowly opened the door to make sure not to make a sound. He crept over to the bed and poked Magnus. Magnus came up with a start looking at Alec with sleepy eyes.   
“Hey Simon is sleeping in my bed. I well I was wondering if I can sleep with you.” Magnus smiled and scooted over. Alec climbed in and Magnus wrapped his arms around Alec. Facing each other they stared a minute. Both of them amazed at how beautiful the other was. Magnus leaned in and kissed Alec. It could’ve been a couple of seconds but it felt like forever. With that to satisfy them for the night, they fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it’s short.  
> I’m sorry for errors too. I’ve been binge watching Supernatural and I’m on season 7. I’m not good at double tasking


	27. In the closet

Instead of a morning kiss, Magnus was awoken with brutal shaking. He opened his eyes just to see Ragnor standing over him with an annoyed look. "What is it Ragnor?"Magnus said. He was way too tired to yell like he usually did. Ragnor raised his eyebrows and held his arms out, motioning them toward him and Alec. "Not am it. A who." Magnus rolled his eyes and flopped back down in his back. Ragnor just gave him a more incredulous look. "Mind you when I went to sleep, I heard you come in. I expected to see one person in this bed. Not two." Magnus groaned and sat back up. "Look nothing happened If that's what your worried about." Ragnor sighed. "Well the next time "nothing happens" tell me." "Whatever." Magnus said turning toward Alec and wrapping his arms around him. He was just about to doze off when the alarm went off. BAARING BAARING. WHOOSH. ALARM SOUND. "Ugh!" Magnus groaned sitting up for like the millionth time. "Oh yeah it's time to get ready." Ragnor said smirking. "Oooh you just wait till I get out of this bed. I will break off every piece of-" "Ummm Magnus." Magnus looked at Alec. His hair was messed up, but the most adorable thing about him was his confused look. He looked in between Ragnor and Magnus. Magnus just smiled. "Good morning Alexander." Magnus said giving Alec a peck on the lips. " I was just having a conversation with Ragnor." "Conversation?" Alec said not believing a word. "Oh yes. I was telling Ragnor of how he is one of my dearests friends, and when we get the chance we should go somewhere to... get to know each other better." Magnus said giving a sweet smile. Alec shook his head smiling slightly. "I have to go get ready. Meet you here?" Magnus nodded. Alec gave a small smile and walked out the door. Magnus grabbed the pillow and threw it at Ragnor's head. " HOW DARE YOU WAKE ME BEFORE MY ALARM!!!" Alec smiled from down the hall. It looks like Magnus got his mojo back. ———————————————————————— Alec heard arguing from his room. He ran into the room almost breaking the door knob. "Dude what the Hell?!" "Oh I'm sorry. I'm not the one who just randomly appears in someone's bedroom." "GUYS!!" Alec shouted at Jace and Simon. "It's time to get dressed we need to go to school." "Umm no it isn't. We're finding Raphael." Alec took off his shirt and walked toward his dresser. "Well whatever it is I'm pretty sure we'll have to wear clothes."  Jace and Simon still didn't move from their spots. "Hello?!" Alec said raising his voice. Jace went to his closet to get dressed. "My clothes are umm.. in my room." "We'll let me get ready and then we'll go. We have all day." Alec put on some black pants and  a dark blue shirt. He brushed his teeth washed his face, then went towards the door. He grabbed the handle when he realized Simon wasn't behind him. "Simon let's go." Simon looked at him confused. "What?" Alec said irritated. God he really hated mornings. "Aren't you going to fix your hair?" Alec gave him the "your stupid" look. "It is fixed." Alec said unimpressed. Simon gave him a look of horror. Alec hugged and went to the bathroom. He didn't see anything wrong with his hair and jus raked his hand through it a couple of times. He walked out. "Ok now let's go." He walked out before Simon could say that he made it worse. They walked down the hallway in silence for the most part. "What if he's gone?" Simon said his voice wavering. "He's not. He loves you too much. And he's also as stubborn as hell." Simon nodded. They got to the door, and Simon turned his key and pushed the door, except it didn't open. He pushed again and it still didn't budge. "It's not moving." Simon said worriedly. Alec pushed it a couple of times. It didn't move. "We'll come on. We have to work together to get it open." They pushed against it a couple of times to whet a small crack revealed itself. "So I guess you'll go in then." Simon said nervously. "No you are. I'm too tall, and there could be like a splinter that could impale me. So no." Simon stepped in front of the space. "When you get to the other side move whatever's in front of the door so I can come in." Simon gave a quick nod and maneuvered his way in the room. A desk was blocking the door, but how did it get there? Simon struggled but managed to move it out of the way. Alec came in and took a look around. "Someone has to be up in here, that desk didn't move itself. Let's find them." Simon grabbed his Batman action figure off of the desk and held it up like a sword. "Are you serious?" Alec said looking at him. "Well yeah. Batman's bravery is spreading to me. I can feel it." "Yeah whatever." Alec said starting to look around. They heard a rustle in the closet. Slowly they crept towards it standing on either sides. “Ok let’s open it up.” Alec said whispering. “No! Let’s do the count.” Alec’s eyebrows furrowed. “I’m gonna count to 3 on my fingers, then we’re going to open it. Its like in every superhero movie ever.” “No, that’s doing extra. That’s how people get killed in the movies.” Alec said reaching for the handle. “No, _that’s_ how they get killed.” Simon said motioning towards Alec’s hand.”You need to think before going in a door. Come on Alec, I’ve always wanted to do this.” Alec sighed. “Ok. Get to countin.” Simon held out his fingers and mouthed 3,2,1. Then Alec opened the door. With Simon’s Batman figurine raised, and Alec’s fist being held out, they prepared to face whoever was in the closet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Simon and Alec are partners in crime 


	28. Pocket knife

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N I forgot to mention the person was in a hoodie or jacket that made it hard to see their face... whoops

With Simon's  Batman figurine raised, and Alec's fist being held out, they prepared to face whoever was in the closet.

————————————————————————

Alec opened and pushed the door. Very hard. The slam of the door on the wall made Simon clutch his Batman figure and shriek with fear. There was a huddled figure in the closet trembling. It's back was against the wall and it had its head in its arms. Almost like it was scared. It dawned on Alec that this wasn't an it. But a who. Keep in mind Simon was shrieking for 20 seconds straight not even looking in the closet.  Alec rolled his eyes and hit his shoulder. "Simon, look." Tilting his head toward the shivering body in the closet. When Simon finally looked his eyes widened.

"Ohh!!" He said loudly. Alec gave him a look that shouted seriously. "Ooh my bad." He said a little quietly this time.  Alec went toward the person and crouched down in front of them.

"Hey are you okay?", he said reaching out toward the person. His hand almost touch their shoulder when the person took out a knife and swung it full force. Alec jumped back before the knife got him, and started breathing heavily. He hurried and rushed up almost tripping on his feet. Simon grabbed his shoulder.

"Hey it's ok. It's fine the person was just scared ok." Alec nodded, his breathing not slowing down. "Go get Magnus and the others, maybe they can help. Hey, Alec you with me?" Alec gulped and shook his head yes. But the only thought going through his head was knife knife knife. As Alec stumbled to the door and out of the room Simon just stood there awkwardly. The person didn't move at all. Made no sound. Simon started pacing, humming, basically doing anything he could to get some kind of reaction from the person in the closet. Finally he had enough. It felt like he was alone. And he wasn't going to have that. Although part of his brain wanted to talk to the person, the other part didn't want to go near them. Curiosity killed the cat. One part of his brain said. Yeah, but satisfaction brought it back. The other part said. Well I'm gonna take my chances. Simon finally decided. He went to the closet a couple of inches from the person. They physically squeezed them self more into the wall. Simon scooted a little closer.

"Hey. I'm Simon." He said softly. "I won't hurt you." He said reaching out. But soon as he did, the person swung his pocket knife out again, and nicked Simon's hand. The person held the knife toward Simon scooting back. "Ah!" Simon yelled. He rushed to the bathroom and let it run on his hand. Oh he remembered as he got a towel and applied pressure on the cut. Out the corner of his eye he saw the person running straight for the door. He ran after them and as the person opened the door and had the doorknob in hand he was right there. The person pointed the pocket knife at Simon. Where are Powers Rangers when you need them? Simon thought. Then he saw it. The knife. He knew that knife.

                        Flashback

It was about the beginning of their relationship and Raphael had just found out about his cutting.

"Simon, how could you do this to yourself?" Raphael said. Simon had expected anger or disgust, but Raphael just looked...sad.

"I-I'm sorry.. I just. I can't take it anymore." Raphael shook his head and was about to take a step, but decided not to.

"Simon you are amazing. Your selfless, kind, funny. There's no one like you." Simon huffed.

"Exactly. There's NO ONE like me. I'm annoying, I cry too much, and I can't be alone in a room for a minute. I'm pathetic, just a waste of space." Simon said with tears in his eyes.

"Simon no. You are none of those things. Do your remember when we first met?" Raphael asked. Simon nodded his head and smiled. Raphael threatened to kill him if he took a step toward him. Simon just bothered him for hours. It was awesome. Simon talked so much that Raphael just gave up and talked back. They actually had decent conversations. "Simon if you were pathetic, do you think I would've dated you, or decide to be dorm partners?" Simon shook his head and a couple of tears fell down. Raphael sighed his eyes watery. "I know I've never said it, and it's a little early but...I love you." Simon's eyes went wide.

"You do?" Raphael nodded letting a tear slip.

"I love you Simon Lewis." Simon was about to go for a hug, but remembered that Raphael didn't do that. Instead he gave a smile. Surprisingly Raphael took a step forward. "Now. I need you to give me your knife." Raphael said holding his hand out.

"B-but I."

"Simon please." Raphael pleaded. "I love you and I can't stand to see you do this to yourself. Please give me the knife."

“But it’s my dad’s” Simon said brokenly.

“I know baby, but please. For me. Your dad wouldn’t want you to do this.” Simon slowly pulled out the knife and handed it to Raphael. Who took it and put it in his pocket. Raphael gave a smile. "Come on, let's go see if we can go find any snacks." Simon nodded and followed Raphael out the room.

                    End of Flashback

Simon's eyes widened with fear. "W-where did you get that knife?" He asked with his voice shaking. The person stayed silent. Simon's fear was then replaced with anger. "LOOK I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE THINKING YOU CAN JUST BARGE IN HERE BUT THAT IS MINE!!! GIVE IT BACK!!" The person muttered a no, and all Simon could see was red. He moved up to take the knife when he saw the persons face. Raphael Simon stopped and tears of joy fell softly down his cheeks. "Raphael!" He shouted happily. Raphael looked up with tears in his eyes.

"No no no." He muttered under his breath. Simon's smile fell.

"I-I'm sorry for yelling at you, I-I didn't know it was you. We've been looking for you." Raphael was crying now holding the knife and pacing. Simon didn't know what to do. He had never seen Raphael like this. His eyes wandered to the knife in Raphael's hand. He suddenly ran forward and tried to grab the knife. And Raphael pushed him back. Raphael was full on crying.

"S-Simon?"He said with a chocked cry. Forgetting the pain in his arm, and everything else. He went and engulfed Raphael in a hug. Raphael tensed up but relaxed a couple seconds later. Raphael slumped against Simon and sobbed into his shirt. Simon reached around him, got the knife and dropped it on the ground. He slumped to the ground with Raphael in his arms. Simon backed them on the wall for support and just held him close. Crying a little himself Simon sniffed and rubbed circles in Raphael's back. That's how everybody found them. Magnus's anger dissipated as he saw what was in front of him. Alec was a little shaken up, but was still glad that Raphael was back. "It's ok, y'all can go back."

"But-" Izzy started worriedly.

"It's ok." Simon repeated."I got it. When he's ok, and when I find out what happened I'll tell you." All of them hesitantly left, glancing back at Raphael. When the door shut, Simon looked at Raphael. Raphael pushed Simon softly and went to the bed. Laying down he went to sleep without a goodnight... well good morning. Sighing Simon got up and went toward the door.

“Stay?” Raphael said so softly that Simon almost didn’t hear. Simon nodded and sat on the edge of Raphael’s bed. Raphael grabbed him with shaking hands, and pulled him down next to him. “Isn’t he scared?” Simon couldn’t help but to think. But when he heard Raphaels snores next to him he couldn’t bring himself to care. The only thing left in his head was one question.

What happened to him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it’s long. But I’d have it too long and not too short. And I tried to add italics but it kept on messing up, so sorry about that.


	29. Cured??

It wasn’t even thirty minutes when Raphael woke up screaming.  
“NO PLEASE!!” He screamed sitting up quickly. Simon then wrapped his arms around Raphael. Still crying Raphael pushed against Simon’s arms. It took all of Simon’s strength to hold on to Raphael. After a couple of minutes Raphael stopped moving and his sobs subsided.  
“I’m sorry.” Raphael said in a shaky voice. Simon kissed the top of his head.  
“It’s ok. It’s just a nightmare.” Taking a deep breath Raphael rubbed his eyes. He then let out a small laugh.  
“What’s so funny?” Simon said worried. Even he wouldn’t laugh in this situation. And that’s really saying something.  
“I bet you think I’m weak now.” Simon’s frown deepened as he held Raphael’s hand looking in his eyes.  
“You are not weak. You are actually really strong and I’m so proud of you. You are so brave.” Raphael scoffed with disbelief.  
“Oh yeah how.” Simon smiled a little.  
“I’ve been touching you for a long time now and you haven’t said or done anything that would’ve implied that you wanted me to stop.” Raphael’s mouth opened and closed. Then his eyes widened. He looked down at him and Simon’s intertwined hands then back in his eyes. A huge grin broke out in his face. He leaped and hugged Simon. Simon stood still but then hugged back.  
“I-I don’t think I’m scared anymore. Simon...I’m not scared!!” Simon grinned. Maybe whatever happened to Raphael was good. But...that would also mean that Raphael would have to leave. No, stop being selfish Simon thought.  
“Well let’s go get the others then.” Simon said. At that moment Izzy busted in with the others.  
“Ok I can’t take this anymore!What’s going on!” Raphael stood up and smiled. Alec had a confused look.  
“Now I’m pretty sure that wasn’t supposed to happen.” He whispered to Magnus who was just as confused.  
“You guys I’m clear. I’m not scared anymore.” He said happily. Maia crosses her arms.  
“Prove it. And not with Simon.” Raphael looked back at Simon who just shrugged. He went over and hugged Izzy for 3 seconds and let go still holding her shoulders. Izzy’s mouth was parted slightly.  
“Believe me now?” He asked smugly. Maia still had a doubtful look on her face but shrugged. Ragnor then butted in.  
“You guys we should talk outside.” He said seriously. Everybody nodded and started walking towards the door.  
“Umm not you Raphael. You can wait in here.” Raphael nodded and stood back.  
“You want me to stay.” Simon asked.  
“No it’s ok. I’ll wait here.” As everybody huddled and we’re a couple of inches from the door a feeling of dread pooled in his stomach.  
“Ummm are you guys sure I don’t need to come along?” Raphael called out.  
“Yeah we’re sure.” Ragnor called out before he walked out following the others. Simon looked back one last time before closing the door. Fear shot up in Raphael’s body. His breathing quickened and he felt tears about to fall out of his eyes.  
How am I having a panic attack? Raphael thought confused. He was alone. He went to the corner and curled in a ball rocking slightly. His fear getting worse every second.  
What’s happening to me?

———————-In the hallway——————————  
When Simon closed the door, Ragnor didn't miss a beat.  
"Am I the only one whose concerned how Raphael got over his fear that fast." Ragnor said angrily.   
"Yeah, we are a little skeptical, but how about we investigate later and enjoy this now." Ragnor shook his head crossing his arms.  
" No, this isn't right, it's impossible to get over a phobia that fast."   
"He's had it for years." Simon said defensively.   
"Yeah but yesterday he barely got near us. I don't care what y'all have to say but that's not natural."  
"And we'll deal with that later. Can't you just be happy for him." Ragnor shook his head.  
"No. I'll figure this out." At this point everybody was irritated. Except Izzy and Simon. They were steaming hot. Izzy stepped forward and was about to give Ragnor a piece of her mind. Well, more than a piece. When a scream broke the air. Simon was the first to rush in and see what happened. He ran over to Raphael who was still curled in a ball.  
"What happened?!" Simon asked worriedly, Simon shook his head as his breathing evened up. He quickly wiped his eyes and gulped.  
"I can't fix it if you don't tell me what's going on." Raphael looked at the group who shown a mix of anger, fear, and worriedness (made up a new word) Raphael got up and went to Ragnor.   
"We need to fix this." Raphael said shakily putting his head in his hands.  
"Fix what?" Everybody said at the same time.  
"I think I might have Simon's phobia now." Raphael said sadly. All everybody could do was stare shockingly.   
"We'll you heard him, let's go fix this. My room in 10 minutes." Ragnor said speed-walking our the door. Everybody slowly walked out Izzy being the last. She closed the door quietly and by the sound of her heels, walked as slow as she could. Simon looked then went to his boyfriend and hugged him tightly.  
"We're gonna figure this out." Was all he said as they broke apart, joined hands, and walked to Ragnor and Magnus's shared dorm room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love making my baby hurt.... sorry it’s kinda short


	30. Too Many Questions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiiii... I know it's been a long time. I'm truly sorry. Being a freshmen in High School sucks. It's been 2 weeks and I still have trouble finding my classes. It's probably because of my bad memory, but it's still hard. This might be short cuz I wrote my chapter down on paper, and it probably looks like a lot on paper sooo yeah.  
> #saveshadowhunters

On their way to Magnus' room Ragnor was going through every possible explanation for Raphael's condition.

"Ok well it could be trauma, or some type of disease. Have you been coughing up blood lately?"

"Stop asking questions!?" Izzy basically screamed in the hallway. "I'm pretty sure Raphael would like some peace and quiet right about now. Right?" Everyone stopped and looked up at Raphael. He was holding onto Simon's arm for dear life.

"Umm it-it's ok." He said stuttering. Everyone noticed how bad Raphael was taking this. Before anyone could say anything Ragnor started back.

"So any nausea, vomiting, diarrhea?"

"What does diarrhea have to do with anything?" Magnus said clearly annoyed.

"It shortens the list down. I'll figure it out by the end of the day." Catarina laid a hand on his arm.

"It's ok that you don't know. We don't either." Ragnor shook his head.

"No I know what it is, I just-I just need time." Catarina pressed her fingers on the bridge of her nose. These past couple of days has taken a toll on everyone, especially Ragnor. She guess's that she'll talk to him when they're alone. With Ragnor bombarding Raphael with questions, they kept down the hallway until they turn the corner.

"Magnus!?"

"shit." Magnus muttered softly under his breath. Luke made his way to the hallway where they were.

"Everyone act cool." Maia whispered as she put on her best smile.

"Hello Mr. Garroway." He smiles at her.

"Hello Maya." He frowned realizing the crowd of kids in the hallway."Why aren't any of y'all in class." They looked at each other hoping that they would all have the same excuse.

"Umm..Raphael felt sick so we uh came to take him to the infirmary." Simon said quickly. Alec hung his head down. Simon couldn't lie to save his life.

"Yeah...right." Like said not believing a word.

"It's true, his phobia was switched." Clary blurted out. Magnus grabbed her arm and pulled her to the side.

"What the hell, we could get in trouble for this." Clary rolled her eyes.

"It's Luke, we can trust him." She said yanking her arm back.

"Switched you say?" He said getting a little pale. No one noticed though.

"Y-Yes?" Simon said. Magnus rolled his eyes again and pulled Clary to the side.

"Look I get that he's technically your dad, but that doesn't mean he won't stab us in the back." Clary scoffed.

"Well I get that YOU'VE never had a dad, so you can just back off." Magnus threw her arm down.

"You are such a self centered brat."

"And you are just a needy asshole that can't go a day without caking his face in makeup!"

"THATS ENOUGH!" Luke shouted. "BOTH OF YOU." Magnus glared at Clary but held his tongue. He turned and went toward Alec.

"That's right, go on and run." Clary said bitterly putting Jace's arm around her shoulder.

"Clary enough." Luke said clearly stressed. Magnus smiled sweetly. All Alec was thinking at this point was oh shit. Magnus smiling after something like that would only mean that whatever he was about to go off. Alec grabbed Magnus's shoulders.

" It was nice talking to you Luke but we were just about to leave." He tried to stir Magnus the other way, but Magnus didn't budge.

"Yes it was talking to you. I know see why Clary likes you so much." He pauses and smiled at Clary. "I mean, dealing with her for this long is a real big accomplishment. She is whiny and doesn't care about anyone but herself. With the exception of Jace of course." He looked at Jace who looked boiling hot. "But yes, I see now how strong you are." Everyone's eyes went wide.

"Ok time to go." Maia said pushing in front of everyone. She walked ahead, but barely anyone moved.

"Get to class." Luke said exasperated. He thought he heard...never mind. Everybody muttered a couple of oks and took a couple of steps. Besides Clary's red face and Magnus's satisfied look nothing was out of the ordinary. All of a sudden Raphael cried out in pain clutching his head. As he fell to the floor Raphael and Maia barely caught him. He was clutching his hand with both hands now and was shaking.

"Come on we need to go to the infirmary!" Simon yelled as he put Raphaels arm around his shoulders.

"We can't." Luke said sadly. Everybody stopped and looked at him for a moment.

"Well screw this." Jace said as he got Raphaels other arm and. "Let's go." They all started moving but Luke just blocked their way.

"The reason you can't go is because they'll take Raphael again." This caught everyone's attention.

"What do you mean 'catch him again'?" Izzy asked. "And how do you know?" He sighed looking around.

"I can't tell you here. Let's go in my office."

"Umm you guys I don't know if you've noticed but my boyfriend is HAVING A SEIZURE ON THE FLOOR!!" Simon yelled frustrated.

"Unless you have something that would make him better, we need to get help"

"I have some things in my office that will put him to sleep." Simon looked at Raphael a couple of seconds.

"Ok." Everyone started walking except Simon.

"Uhhh Hellooo." Everyone turned around. Look I know that I'm all macho and tough... but uhh I need help over here. Jace rolled his eyes and got Raphaels other arm. With Raphaels shaking only minimal, it was easier to carry him. So on they walked, all curious of what's to come.

——————————————————————-——

Mrs., you might want to see this. The clicking of heels could be heard making their way across the room. How dare he. From the computer the hallway camera was showing Luke leading a couple of kids down the hallway. With their experiment.

"Link with the cameras in his room and record the whole thing."

"There aren't any cameras in his room Mrs." She got madder by the second. Luke had sworn he wouldn't say a word.

"Well then. It looks like I'm going to have to fix this myself." With that she turned around and walked away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wuuuut... Who is this mystery woman and what's wrong with Raphael. To be continued...  
> Mwhahahahah


	31. The NSFA

"Ok, this may be very hard to understand for you all." Luke said eyeing all of them across the room.  
"We'll understand, just get to talkin already." Maia said crossing her arms. Simon gave her a wtf expression and she just shrugged. Simon shook his head in disbelief as he leaned down to Raphael. For it only being a couple of minutes, he was looking better. At least that was what he told himself.   
"Well as you all know, this institution is run by the NSFA." Ragnor furrowed his eyebrows.  
"What the hell is that." Maya said.  
"National Society  
"Yeah but the NSFA was banned from the government for smuggling drugs. There is no way that their still there."  
"Yet they are." Like said with bitterness. Despite everything they did, they got one more chance. And they spent it on this." He said motioning around the room. For years I have been on this staff, overhearng things. I never thought they were true until now."   
"Where am I." The whole group turned toward Raphael who sat up. Simon lunges down and hugged him.  
"Your Okay!" Raphael weakly patted him on the back.   
"Yeah but my back, head, and neck hurts." Simon just gave a small laugh and hugged him even tighter. "You still haven't answered my question." said in a tight voice. After all he was being choked to death. "Oh yeah we're in Luke's office." Raphael looked at Luke who gave him a small wave. Raphael was puzzled. "Why are we here exactly." "We're about to find out what happened to you." Raphael immediately sat up. "You mean he knows."   
"Apparently." Maya said. " He was just about to get to the good part." Everyone looked at Luke as a signal to go on.   
"Well as I said they were given a second chance. They didn't get suspended because the drug was weed or ecstasy, but it was something way worse. Ambrosia." "I have never heard of that." Ragnor says. "No one has." Luke explains, " Scientists had just made it, and the NSFA were the first to hear about it. The drug was originally made for psychopaths, and schizophrenics. The drug goes in your brain and reverses whatever mental illness you have. So if someone hears voices in their head..."  
"They stop hearing them." Ragnor finished off.   
"Exactly. The only thing that the scientists forgot to do was actually test it. The person who tested it was a psychopath himself. Sebastian Verlac. But nobody knew until it was too late. The NSFA bought a lot of it. They gave it to everyone here when it first came out. The results were terrible. Everybody fell sick. The government paid the Institute more money to use. That's when everything went down. They got thousands of dollars a month for health insurance, that all the owners got rich. When the drug was banned, they still continued to use it. I guess money just does that to people.  
" Sebastian Verlac's dead though." Ragnor said. " How could he have done all that damage in such a short amount of time."  
"He was just a very cruel person. After he died the authorities found his journal. As it turns out he was using human experiments. He wasn't lying about the drug fixing the phobias, but some of the aftereffects were terrible. Most of the subjects died, the others ended up with cancer, boils, or were just in pain for the rest of their lives."  
"WHAT!!!!" Simon shouted. An uproar began about Raphael. "THERE HAS TO BE A CURE!!!" Simon yelled. He had tears in his eyes. He couldn't let them fall. Raphael was not going to die on him.  
"People say there is, but there's no proof." Simon sniffed. It wasn't a yes, but it wasn't a no either.   
"Where can we find it." Jace said.  
"Well people say it's in the-" Luke never got to finish the sentence. Everyone looked at the door as it opened. Smoke filled the air as everyone passed out one by one. Before going down Catarina looked up.   
"You should've kept your mouth shut Lucian." The woman kicked her heel in the side of Luke's neck. The woman looked at Catarina. She couldn't tell who it was, but she stayed conscious enough to see her walk away. Then in a flash of red, Catarina's world went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WASSSSOOOOUUUUPPP BABIES!!!!!! I know it's been a long time, but I didn't forget. The next chapter is gonna be LIT. But luckily for me, classwork has dialed down some. I'm up for homecoming court, YAAAAY. Its a little rainy and warm down here in Louisiana, but it's ok. Cause I'm the LORAX. I SPEAK FOR THE TREES.


	32. Chapter 32

Maia opened her eyes just to see nothing. I'm blindfolded. She thought groggily. She heard yelling from far away.

"YOU GAVE THEM TOO MUCH. WHAT IF WE LOST THEM. HALF A MIlLION WORTH OF DOLLARS DOWN THE DRAIN!! FIX THIS!!

Damn. Maia thought. That's 500,000 dollars. She tried to move but felt her hands behind her back. She tried to move whatever was on her hands, but the trying was no use. She heard someone walking over. She struggled more but it just brought her more pain. Why am I so sore. She thought. She felt the blindfold being snatched off of her eyes and her head tilted up. She squinted, but got a clear enough face. He was kinda the same skin tone she was, had a brutish accent. He dropped her chin and wrote on the clipboard he had.

"Wher-Where am I." She asked. He rolled his eyes and continued to write on his clipboard.

"Hey I'm talking to you." Maia said a little louder.

"Shut up and be still!" He shouted. No one EVER shouts at Maia. She glared at him and formed a plan. Well here goes nothin'. She prayed to herself.

"You know these knots behind my back are very good. I was a Girl Scout, and I would never have been able to tie a knot like this." He smirked up at her.

"We have all your history, you were never a Girl Scout." She huffed.

"Oh really. Well I don't believe it. You people think your so smart, I think your just bluffing. There is no way you have every kid up in here's information. It's impossible." He put his clipboard down on the table next to the heart monitor and chuckled. How the hell did I not notice that. Well never mind.

"We have all the information about all the students here." He said proudly.

"What do you mean we." She asked. She had to know more.

"The NSFA of course." Interesting she thought. She saw the pen on his clipboard.

"So seriously how did you tie this knot. I can untie every knot ever made and I've never been bound like this." He smirked and crossed his arms.

"I know what your doing. If you find out what knot it is, you can untie it. I'm not stupid Miss Roberts." He said. Crap, Maia thought, Jesus please give me an idea. She sighed and tried to move her hands again. Why would they use rope instead of handcuffs.

"Hey douchebag!" Maia yelled at the man. He didn't respond. "You could've used handcuffs instead of rope. But I guess your too stupid to comprehend that." He sighed annoyingly.

"If we put you in handcuffs you would have struggled and cut yourself. We wouldn't want our projects getting hurt."

"Well these rope burns are no joke either." She said bitterly. She caught a slight migraine and groaned. The heart monitor gave a little beep. He picked up his clipboard and started flipping up the pages. What he didn't notice though wasthat the pen fell of the table and rolled towards her. She gave a small smile and stretched her foot trying to reach the pen. It rolled a couple of more inches but was still far away. She tried again, but right when she almost had it the man picked it up.

"You gotta be quicker than that." She huffed. So close. He put the pen under her chin and lifted up.

"Your not going to get out of here so you might as well quit while your ahead." Think think. There had to be something here. Maia looked around. Heart monitor, table. Wait the heart monitor. It went off earlier, but Maia had a headache. Ok all I have to do is have another headache...easy peasy. She thought hard. About stuff that annoyed her, stuff that was stupid...anything. When it didn't work she sighed and looked up at the man, just writing away on his clipboard. She squinted her eyes. She was about to give up when a sharp pain in her abdomen. She cried out as the heart monitor went crazy. He ran towards it trying to fix it. This is my chance she thought. She pulled her hands as hard as she could and yanked it a couple of times till her arms broke free. The man turned and pushed her back, trying to put her hands back up. She yanked them back and punched him. He stumbled back a little clutching his nose. She bent over undoing the ties on her feet and bolted for the door. Well tried. The man with  blood on his nose and hands pushed her back and grabbed the syringe behind the heart monitor. Come on, how did I not notice this stuff. She internally groaned. He gave a twisted smile.

"I told you. Your not going to make it out alive. Neither are your little friends." Friends. Oh hell no. She glared at him and tried to run past him. He tried to push the syringe in her neck but she dodged it. He slapped her down to the floor and stood over her. She kicked him in the balls and got up. She tried to grab the syringe out of his hand, but he jerked up almost stabbing her. She then maneuvered his hand and made the syringe go into his arm. She hurriedly pushed the liquid into his arm and stood back. He tried to get up but fell down. He started seizing on the floor then stopped non moving. Maia, breathing heavily now went and punched the heart monitor, which has been beeping for a couple of minutes. She then ran to the door and opened it. She just saw a white hallway going both left and right. Her friends, she thought. Limping slightly, she tried to go and find the others. Hopefully it wasn't too late.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wooo that was a long chapter. Stay tuned folks. Sorry about the wait


	33. Jordan Kyle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maia meets Jordan trying to get out. Can they save Maia’s friends and get out, or will they get caught?

Maia crept down the long hallway slowly. There were doors full of computers on every door she turned to. Sighing she just opened a door and went in. She heard the computers buzz and whir around her. She went over to one and looked at it. It was just a big black box with colorful blinking lights all around it. It had switches, knobs, and just overall a bunch of wires. Deciding not to touch it she limped seeking a way to get to her friends. When she saw no way, she just turned around to walk out of the door when she saw a woman with 2 body guards behind her. She hurried and ducked behind one of the big boxes. She bit her lip trying not to groan at the pain. "Find the girl." She heard the woman say. Once they walked away going their separate ways, she got ready to make a run for it. Just as she was about to run, she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned and automatically punched the person in the nose. The person sucked In a breath and grabbed his nose. Maia pulled back her hand to punch him again when he put his hands up.

"Don't punch, I'm here to help you, I know a way out."

"How do I know your not one of them." She asked still holding up her fists.

"They took me too ok. There's a hidden door right on the back wall, we can both get out of here." She glanced at the back walk then back to him.

"Who are you."

"Jordan. Jordan Kyle. I'm 17 and I was taken a couple of weeks ago. I've been plotting this escape for a long time. You can come with me."

"My friends are here. I'm not leaving without them."

"Well, how many are there?"He said looking a bit nervous.

"10 including me." He rolled his eyes.

"That's too many, 1 person is going to have to stay back."

"We'll figure that out later. Can you help me get them out or not?"

He sighed then nodded. He got up reaching out his hand to take hers.  She slowly got up as he was looking around. Then out of nowhere he grabbed her arm, started sprinting to the back of the room and dropped to a crouch. Maia but down hard on her lip to stop from crying out. She hit his shoulder glaring. He gave her one of those 'wtf' looks that she knew so well.

"Why'd you yank my arm? She whispered clutching it. He rolled his eyes. And pointed to the ceiling.

"That camera goes back and forth every 2 minutes. If we get caught in it, the guards will be here in under a minute." Maia nodded licking the sore spot on her lip. The waited about two minutes when Jordan grabbed her arm again. She yanked it back.

"I can handle myself, thank you very much."  He sighed and got up.

"Ok... 3...2...1!!!" They made it to the door and opened it. He threw Maia in and hurriedly closed the door. Jordan raked his hand through his hair and turned just to be met with a slap on the face.

"Dude what the hell!" Maia crosses her arms and smirked.

"First of all I'm not a dude. And second of all I told you to not do that again." She walked off looking around.

"Where are we anyway?" She said. It was basically a lab type place with just a bunch of IVs dangling.

"Luckily its a win win. Through that door is the way out, but they bring the test subjects here."

She nodded. "It was really stupid of them to put an exit right there."

"Yeah but it's apart of the test. They see how hope affects the results. They're basically giving  us hope and just taking it away over and over again." Maia opened her mouth to say something, but heard wheels rolling. They hid under the desks. Maia internally groaned at how close they were. They heard the door open, and wheels rolling on the floor. They heard footsteps leave and Maia almost got out when she heard talking.

"Where are subjects 7 and 16?"

"Subject 16 injured Dr. Aldertree, and subject 7 has been missing for a couple of days."

"Well this infers that they are working together. Tell all security to be on lookout."

"Yes ma'm." Maia heard the footsteps leave, and the light turn off. Even though it was dark Jordan and Maia waited 5 more minutes. Maia could tell Jordan was scared.

"So your scared of the dark?" She said getting up feeling her way around the desk.

"Not of the dark... but what happens in the dark." Maia saw Jordan turn on his mini flashlight. They went to go see what was rolled in. She paled. It was them. All her friends. She went to take out the IVs but Jordan stopped her.

"If you take them out the monitors will go flat. Some of the scientists will come in to see if they are dead." Taking her shaking hand back, Maia nodded her head.

"So...what do we do?" She asked. Looking at all of them like this was unbelievable. Especially Izzy. Her usual complexion was pale, and her lips were a light tinge if blue. Her fashionable clothes was replaced with a blue dress. It was basically a trash bag made of burlap. She looked back at Jordan.

"I can fix the system, I just need a couple of minutes. He went and grabbed the other side of his flashlight, which had a screw and other things on it. Jordan opened the back of the monitor. Maia, holding her breath, watched as Jordan went to the first wire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ohhhhh yeeeeeaaaaaa...... PLEASE LIKE AND COMMENT


	34. Close

Maia was restless as Jordan went to the first wire, if the alarm was triggered they would both be dead. Jordan took a deep breath and put the little knife on the wire.

"Here we go." You could tell he was trying to be tough. He snipped it and waited a couple of seconds. Nothing happened. They both let out a breath they didn't know they were holding.

"Ok one more and then the monitors will be turned off."

"Wait one more?!" Maia whisper shouted. "In the movies all they cut is one wire and they're done."

" Well this isn't a bomb isn't it?" He said looking back at her.

"Well it could be. I can't believe they made it this easy." Jordan shrugged and went to clip the wire. He cut it and the monitor shut off. Jordan gave a little smile and took the IV out of the girl. He got her and set her on the ground slowly.

"Ok let me do the others," he said bending next to another one. He went to clip the first wire when Maia stopped him.

"This one looks different than the others. They all might have different wiring." Jordan looked at it.

"Good job, didn't catch that." After that he got every one of them out of the IVs and onto the floor. That was great and all but there was one problem. They weren't moving. None of them made a single sound or notion that would have shown they were alive. They waited a couple of minutes and nothing happened. Maia started to get worried.

"When are they going to wake up?" Jordan looked a little worried too.

"Hopefully soon." they waited 10 more minutes. Nothing.

"Ok...so this is harder than we thought." They we're running out of time.

"Well we only have one option." Jordan went over and balled up the collar of Simon's shirt and slapped him. Hard.

Still nothing happened.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Maia almost screamed. Jordan just grumbled. Maia looked around the room for some way to wake them up. She went over to the IV's and lifted them. The fluid was blue, but that's all she got.

There has to be something here she thought. As she walked around she bumped into the table.

Stupid table, with its... Wait the table. The table had some drawers with locks on it.

"Jordan come here and open these." Jordan looked at the locks real quick and opened them. There were tubes of white stuff in syringes.

"Jackpot." She grabbed on and was about to stick it in Simon's arm when Jordan stopped her.

"This could kill them. You don't know what this stuff is." Maia stopped for a second to think. A couple of months ago they dealt with this is science. She put a drop on the table, sniffed it and watched it.

"It's not poison." She said before going to Simon. Her stomach gutted because of nerves as she stuck the needle in him. She pushed slowly and after the whole thing was in she took it out and watched him. A couple of seconds later he gasped to life breathing hard. The duo shushed him and he slowly died down and looked around. Maia grabbed three of the syringes and gave it to each of them.

"Come on we need to hurry." Simon looked discombobulated as Jordan and Maia moved on to the next two.

"Where are we, what happened?" He sounded broken as he saw Jordan pushing the white liquid into Raphael.

"I'll explain later, but first we need to wake them up and get out of here before it's too late."  They got the rest awake and slowly got them to move. They all were confused, and were happy they got each other back. Once Izzy woke up she looked in pain but got up.

"Maia?" Maia smiles and almost pushed Izzy back in a hug. Maia almost cried.

"I'm sorry." She said. Izzy smiled.

"It's not your fault." Just then Maia lunged forward and kissed Izzy. She kissed back and when they broke apart they were breathing heavily. ...they forgot there was other people in the room.

"Did it just get hot in here or is it just you two." Everybody rolled their eyes at Magnus who was currently putting his weight on Alec. Catarina and Ragnor weren't surprised in the slightest.

"Umm shouldn't we get out of here." Simon asked confused.

"Ohh.. uhh yeah. The doors right there, all we need to do is..." All of a sudden the alarm sounded. They were closed in by big metal walls. They were so close.

 

 

 

Yet so far.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ohhh did you really think I would make it that easy. Come on now 😈😈


	35. A sliver of Hope

"Come on! " jordan yelled as they all ran to the door. He pulled and pulled but it was jammed.

"Stand back." He kicked the door over and over until it broke down. Outside the door there was the woods.

"Come on!" They dragged the others along and tried to get them to go faster. There were outside going in the woods until... barking. Jordan looked back to see German shepherds on leashes with a group of guards behind them. Maia froze. Her breathing got quick and she couldn't move. Izzy grabbed her by her shoulders. 

"Hey, it's ok. You can do this. I believe in you." She kisses her cheek and smiled. Maia swallowed and nodded. She grabbed Izzy's arm and they ran as fast as they could. The dogs were gaining on them. Jordan stopped.

"I'll stay behind. Y'all need to go."

"No, you can't." Maia said.

"I can and I will. Here, take this. Go!" Maia tried to protest as Jordan put his pick pocket in her hand,but Izzy pulled her away. (I kinda forgot what it was called lol) They all started running. Everybody heard a faint scream in the background but they were too far gone to turn back. Maia couldn't help the tears falling from her eyes.

————————————————————————

“Wait stop stop.” Catarina said heaving. It had felt like they were running forever. Everyone stopped and took a couple of breaths.

“You guys there’s a shed over there.” Simon pointed out. They all walked slowly to the shed.Simon went forward and shoved the door open. The roots and dirt fell from it as it opened. There was an old car surrounded by dirt and leaves.

“You guys there’s a car!” Simon exclaimed.

“Yeah but how are we supposed to make it work genius.” Alec said rolling his eyes.

“Wait a minute.” Maia said. She pulled out what Jordan has given her. “Ragnor is there any chance that I can fix a car with this?” Ragnor thought a minute.

“There might be a slight chance. Pop up the hood right quick.” And just like that, the spark of hope everyone thought was gone returned. They could make it.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is short, and it’s been a long time... I’m sorry ☹️😢


	36. Sorry

Hey guys.... I’m sorry but I’m discontinuing this. I guess I’m more of a short fic person and I lost inspiration for this one. My badness


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